THE NEW WAVE

Wife Swap Across the Pond

2010-05-23T03:49:00.005+01:00

Now we all know the show Wife Swap, and probably all secretly enjoy watching a chavy ASBO filled family of brother-dads and sister-mums from Scunthorpe swap their mother figure with a Soho based family whose children vomit their parent's money straight into the g-strings of London's lapdancers. However, you're always going to get polar opposites being swapped over, as two incredibly similar families swapping wife roles would look as dull as Gordon Brown reading the dictionary. Yet it amazes me how the people on the show still haven't realised themselves that they're going to be trading places with someone totally different to them and their families. The shock that a picture perfect housewife from Cornwall experiences when she ends up living in a caravan with a Gypsy family is nice to watch as in you're mind a huge flashing sign pops up saying "CONFLICT IMMINENT", but I still find it baffling as she says things like "I didn't sign up for this" and "I can't believe this".

This shock is more evident in the American version, as the wives can be essentially the same but with an added ingredient that we in Britain got rid of, much like swine flu and mr bean. This element is religion. The Christianity fuelled families go beserek at morals, the lord's word, family values etc and when it's time for the rule changes to be implemented they freak out and go insane, pacing around their kitchen quoting various bible verses that don't make sense "The Lord's cheese shall not be grated - Matthew 3:17". It's actually a little bit scary to watch. Now I'm not saying there's anything wrong with religion or having a faith, all I'm saying (speaking as an 18 year old who thinks he knows it all when actually I can't even fry an egg, seriously, there's just too much aparatus involved) is that it just isn't as dominant in the media or society any more, sure we get things like Songs of Praise and The Heaven and Earth Show but that's not really anything, so when you get a huge dollop of American preacher material shoved on to your screen it's quite weird to watch, as you can't, quite, believe these people are being serious.

Now this is just a brief article, I'm only really writing it because I've had one too many pepsi's (or Fizzy Pop as it's known to anyone over 40) and can't sleep, and just watched a rather eye opening episode of the show in question.

Parking Mad

2010-04-21T13:21:00.004+01:00

There are many things in this world that we just can't explain no matter how hard we try, £30 million for Dimitar Berbatov being a prime example. On my return to St Brendan's Sixth Form after a two week break I am left baffled once again.

A day doesn't go by without someone complaining about the lack of student parking within college and it is a point that has been brought to St Brendan's attention on numerous occasions. Despite all this, our college has decided to reduce student parking. That's right. REDUCE student parking. This has left me and many other students perplexed and annoyed by this decision.

If there isn't any possible room to fit in additional student parking within the college then that's fine. You can't allocate space if it isn't there. But to reduce student parking seems like a slap in the face to all the students who now have to either find a space around the industrial estate or to risk a £50 fine from McDonalds (I chose the latter, and received the expected punishment).

On top of all this, the repainted bays within the downsized parking in college are far too small. Unless you are willing to climb out of your boot or sun roof, you have no chance of leaving your car.

I have asked the college to explain their decision but I have received no answers as of yet. Apparently students should be seen and not heard.

Who Will Be Crowned Premier League Champions?

2010-03-29T09:28:00.010+01:00

With the penultimate game of the Barclays Premier League season less than two months away and no clear favourite for the title as of yet, we analyse what chances the three main contenders have of being crowned as champions. The three main contenders in question are Arsenal, Chelsea and current holders, Man United.

Arsene Wenger's young Gunners are currently sat in third place and four points behind leaders Man United after dropping two points in the dying moments of Saturday's fixture against Birmingham. You cannot deny Arsenal's ability to play elegant and entertaining football, but you can accuse them of lack of fight.

Times have moved on since the tough-tackling, in-your-face Arsenal teams of old, however this new generation of Gunners seem to lacking any sense of physical presence. Fancy footwork and quick passing are brilliant when you are playing against relegation doomed Portsmouth, but as Man United and Chelsea proved, when faced with a physical challenge they crumble.

After Chelsea's demolition of fourth place battlers Aston Villa, Anceloti's men are still breathing heavily down United's necks, only one point adrift of the champions. Chelsea certainly have the squad to keep them going strong throughout the title race, and without the welcomed burden of Champions League fixtures, they can stay fully focused on the Premier League. They may have dropped points recently to the likes of Blackburn, but I can't see any team picking points from them in their remaining games bar one, Man United.

The two sides meet at Old Trafford this Saturday and it could very well be a title decider. In the past these fixtures have been a case of the unstoppable force and the immovable object and everyone is left with a disappointing draw. This time however, there is one factor that could decide the result of the game and maybe the title race. Wayne Rooney. The England striker has been in world class form this season and unless Chelsea are careful, the white Pele could end their title hopes.

For me, Man United are slight favourites to win the league. Although they are only one bad result away from loosing their lead, they have the best striker in the world at the moment, the strongest squad and they have a manager that has been in this position many times and has more often than not, walked away with the league title.

Man United are currently on eighteen titles overall, level with Liverpool's record that has haunted Manchester for many years. I believe that 2010 will be the season that they set a new record for four consecutive league but more importantly to all United fans, make Liverpool's league record redundant.

Here is my predicted top four for the Barclays Premier League 2009/10 season ...

1. Manchester United

2. Chelsea

3. Arsenal

4. Tottenham

"The Logic of Chance" Promises To Be Something Special

2010-03-03T12:22:00.005Z

With the release date of their latest album looming, the pressure is on Hip-Hop duo Dan Le Sac vs Scroobius Pip to battle the curse of the second album.

Earlier in the year we saw the release of 'Get Better', the first single on the new album, and I was relieved to see that these rising talents have not been affected by the inevitable problems the second album causes. Now Dan Le Sac vs Scroobius Pip have released two new tracks onto their website and they have left this music fan shaking with anticipation like a smack-head awaiting his score.

The two new tracks that have left me in this state are 'Snobs' and 'Stake A Claim', both of which emulate anything from their first album. Snobs has one of the most sing-along choruses I've ever heard and Scroobius Pip's lyrics in Stake A Claim give you a real urge to hit the streets in rebellion, to fight those fat-cats in Parliament.

'The Logic of Chance' is due to be released March 15th and it follows the duo's highly successful first album, 'Angels'. Many artists crumble under the pressure of the second album, failing to match the high standards expected of them after an impressive entrance to the music scene. However, these two Essex lads seem to be handling the curse of the second album quite well, and have just focused on creating lovable, dance all night, sleep all day music.

To catch a listen of Snobs and Stake A Claim, click here!

Feel The LOVE

2010-02-13T08:53:00.008Z

I consider this, at this point, the pinnacle release of my life ... Tom DeLonge

The Angels And Airwaves lead man is absolutely correct. After years of waiting and building anticipation, Angels And Airwaves have finally released their third album, LOVE, and it is truly epic.

In a time where every other band seems to be churning out the same generic sound; catchy/repetitive riffs, meaningless lyrics and all of which packaged in the familiar 'indie-rocker' way. Angels And Airwaves have continued to supply the music scene with some long awaited originality.

Their most notable traits that have made them so popular still remain in their new release and they have been emphasized to immense levels to create a totally unique sound. The band have invested heavily into developing even more synthesised effects into their songs, all of which create a euphoric feeling when listening to the album, especially in the instrumental track, 'Et Ducit Mundum Per Luce'.

However, the biggest breath of fresh air Angels And Airwaves have brought with this album is the sheer hard work and desire put in by everyone in the band to make LOVE as good as it can possibly be. In an interview before the release of the album, Tom DeLonge said, "There’s nothing that I have put more effort, more time, more heart, and more stress into than this release." It seems too many bands these days are desperate to write, record and release an album in the quickest possible time so they can begin to enjoy the rock 'n' roll lifestyle without the tremendous burden of actually creating music. Whereas the Angels And Airwaves philosophy is and has always been to create something with a clear message, no matter how long it takes. A characteristic which has to be admired.

One of the reasons behind the pure originality in the album is the fact that the album has been written as a score for an upcoming film, LOVE."It’s been a very long time since a band has attempted to make a motion picture associated with an album — So when you listen to the record, it’s not orthodox by any means. There’s a lot of interludes and segues that draw you in and transition you to different levels of excitement," Tom later explained.

This album is modern music at it's best. An utterly outstanding composition of music and with the band releasing it for free, you would have to be insane not to download it.

To get the album for free now, visit Fuel.TV

A Miserable Business

2010-02-11T13:30:00.004Z

A similar scene occurs every time I attempt to use public transport, and I know I’m not the only one who is guilty of using this carefully executed facade. My knees bend slightly inwards, I put on the best cute-and-innocent face that I can muster and my voice turns somewhat high-pitched, as I daringly ask for a child ticket. An excruciatingly tense pause follows, as I wait for the verdict: I’m hoping that they are the type of driver that does not care how old you are, as long as you don’t pay them with that £20 note. This is by far the best kind, but is becoming some what of an endangered species in this day and age. The second type is less compliant; he asks for your age. However, when you assure them that you ARE fifteen, they nod in agreement, too naive to think that you might actually not be telling the truth. The third type is a force to be reckoned with. Due to your inability to show them any ID, you end up forking out an extra £3 or walking home in the rain - usually the latter.

The point that I’m really trying to make here is that our generation seems to be suffering from a severe case of not-a-child-but-not-an-adult-either syndrome. And the circumstances where we are considered to be an adult are beyond our control. The need to have to pay adult prices on the bus should bring on a whole load of privileges, the vote for example, or preferably the right to purchase alcohol. It seems we are being taken advantage of, our apparently “disposable” income is being snapped up by those corporations that can get away with classing under 18’s as adults.

Now don’t get me wrong, I am certainly not promoting the idea of regressing back to our play school years, however tempting the thought of free milk and digestive biscuits may seem. In fact I take quite the opposite stance; I wouldn’t mind paying extra if it meant people would take us more seriously. I mean, we can’t even qualify for the full adult minimum wage until we are 21, and by that time most of us will have accumulated about £20,000 in dept. It seems the only privilege gained when you turn 16 is being charged extra for things. But don’t worry, there’s always that faint glimmer of hope when you buy your first lottery ticket! (Oh the irony).

I suppose this is simply a reflection of the world in which we now live, where freddos no longer cost just 10p - no doubt the era of the glorious 1p sweet is long over. And as for the Bristol bus service, it looks like we’re going nowhere fast - quite literally.

Capello Crumbles Under Media Pressure

2010-02-08T15:32:00.005Z

Media witch hunt leaves John Terry Stripped of the captaincy

Last Friday evening Fabio Capello made his first noticeable mistake as England manager. After one of the most publicised weeks in John Terry's career, the England boss decided to give in to the media's pressure and relieve the Chelsea skipper of his duty as captain.

John Terry was drowning in a sea of front and back page headlines after it was revealed that he had been cheating on his wife with Vanessa Perroncel, the ex-girlfriend of Manchester City left-back Wayne Bridge. That's when the newspapers decided to get together, light their torches, sharpen their pitch-forks and have themselves a good old fashioned witch hunt.

In a statement released by Fabio Capello a few hours after his decision, he explained, "As a captain with the team, John Terry has displayed extremely positive behaviour. However, I have to take into account other considerations and what is best for all of the England squad. What is best for all of the England team has inspired my choice."

Very admirable you may think, however Capello still hasn't eliminated the possibility of any problems within the England changing room. He may not be leading the team out to South Africa but John Terry will continue to be a dominant figure within the England team. He will continue to be a big influence within the squad.

So any fear of tension in the England team has not been avoided. Not by a long shot!

Fabio Capello has set a dangerous precedent for English football. From this moment on, every England captain that has a slightly checkered past or makes a mistake in their personal life shall be stripped of their honour and fed to the rabid media hounds.

The prestigious award of leading your country as captain has been whittled down from the best man for the job, to the most popular media figure.

Rooney Heads To Wembley

2010-01-28T17:11:00.007Z

Wayne Rooney's header leaves Manchester City 3-1 down with only seconds remaining

The two teams lined up under the flood lights last night for what was one of the most eagerly anticipated Manchester Derbies in years. The first leg left a bitter taste within the United team as ex-red Carlos Tevez bagged two at Eastlands and taunted the United fans after claiming he was not treated with respect whilst at the club. All of which, along with the prospect of reaching another Carling Cup final, made winning the second leg vital for Manchester United.

The first half was a sea of half chances and it wasn't until the second half that either of the side's keepers were truly tested. When Micah Richard's long range shot seemed destined for the top corner, Edwin Van Der Sar pulled off a phenomenal save high to his left to keep the sides level.

Paul Scholes was the man to break the deadlock after Wayne Rooney played an inch perfect pass to Ryan Giggs who played it back to Portuguese youngster, Nani. After a goal mouth scramble the ball rolled out to Scholes at the edge of the area and he struck home his first League Cup goal in seven years.

It was only 20 minutes later that Carrick passed the ball into the the Manchester City net with great precision and skill after some good build up play by Nani and Darren Fletcher, who later picked up the Man of the Match award. United thought that with less than 20 minutes to go and the aggregate score at 3-2, their place at Wembley was a guarantee. That was until Carlos Tevez continued to haunt his former side by beating Rio Ferdinand in the air to get onto the end of Craig Bellamy's cross and level the aggregate score at 3-3.

With a matter of seconds remaining on the clock, United upped the pressure on City's defence to try and force a winner before extra time. After a world class save by Shay Given prevented Darren Fletcher late on, United gained another corner and it was truly the last possible attack of normal time. United took the corner quick and a one-two between Giggs and new boy Antonio Valencia set up Ryan Giggs to deliver a dangerous cross into the box and inform Rooney got on the end of it and snatched yet another late winner for the reds.

After the memorable 4-3 Manchester derby earlier in the season, no one was surprised to see a high scoreline between the clubs, but I don't think anyone could have imagined the drama on show last night. City's hopes of ending their 34 year trophy drought have taken a hit and now they have to rely on the F.A Cup for any hope of silverware this season.

Not only was this a great Carling Cup semi-final but it was a great derby game, and with Man City's bottomless pit of money growing ever larger, we can only expect this rivalry to grow.

Teens Only Have 800 Word Vocabulary?

2010-01-15T16:59:00.006Z

Proposed 800 word vocabulary will leave teens jobless

According to government child language adviser, Jean Gross, today's modern teenagers have a vocabulary of no more than 800 words. A vocabulary filled with the phenomenon that is 'teen-speak'. She calls for action to be taken urgently to ensure that today's youth do not struggle to find work because of their inabilities to communicate. This warning comes just a week after she claimed that television is damaging children's development.

"We need to help today's teenagers understand the difference between their text speech and the formal language they need to succeed in life - 800 words will not get you a job," Mrs Gross explained in an interview earlier this week.

The majority of teenagers should have, on average 40,000 words within their vocabulary by the age of 16. However, linguists believe that although teenagers do understand tens-of-thousands of words, they only use approximately 800 of them in daily speech. Jean Gross believes that this is due to social networking sites such as Facebook, Myspace and Twitter. "Teenagers are spending more time communicating through electronic media and text messaging, which is short and brief," she added.

Mrs Gross is planning a campaign to take place next year amongst primary and secondary schools across Britain. The focus behind the campaign is to get students understanding the importance of good communication skills to ensure the best possible future for the younger generations.

The idea of teens only using 800 words out of their 40,000 strong vocabulary seems a bit far-fetched to me, but if this is true then there is every right for concern.

A New Year, Same Old Us!

2010-01-02T14:29:00.004Z

All of us here at The New Wave hope you had a fattening Christmas and an intoxicating New Year.

We aim to recover from the holidays and break our new year's resolutions as soon as we can so that we can attack your eyes with our sexy journalism once again!

So, until then .... Bye bye!

Interscope Pull The Plug On Manson

2009-12-18T21:07:00.007Z

The world's most notorious shock-rocker has been dropped by his record label due to disappointing album sales in the U.S.

It has been revealed that after Marilyn Manson's latest album 'The High End of Low' sold little more than 120,000 copies in America, Interscope have decided to part ways with the band.

The album has been heavily criticised amongst the music world, with the band being accused of loosing their edge after the film 'Bowling For Columbine' revealed the intelligent and sensitive side of Marilyn Manson.

"After the film, his mystique as the 'God Of Fuck', scourge of society dissipated; he was understood, even appreciated and the game's been up ever since."

NME claimed the above statement in their album review of 'The High End of Low'. They added, "This album is full of self-pitying dirges which give the impression of a slightly sad man-child sulking about girls in his bedroom."

This opinion seems to be a shared one amongst music critics. All of them complaining that Manson's new album has lost it's edge and by opening himself up to the public he has revealed his true self and no longer has that dark mystery to his persona that was so evident back in the days of 'Holy Wood'. However, despite the heavy criticism and the loss of their record label, Marilyn Manson promises that this is only the beginning.

"I was so restrained from the music that I wanted to make ... At least half of my creative output has been squashed, so now I think people can expect a whole lot more." Manson revealed in an interview with Metal Hammer.

He also announced that he is working on new material, reminiscent of David Bowie's 'Aladdin Sane'. "I think it will be more badass ... I think it's going to be more romantic maybe. Self abusive."

The end of Interscope and Marilyn Manson could be a blessing in disguise for the band. With more creative freedom and complete control we may see more of the Manson of old, or we could see the emergence of something completely unique and original.

All eyes will now be on the band after two consecutive albums failing to impress the critics, but Manson won't be taking notice of what the critics and reviewers say and neither will his fans.

In the words of the iconic shock-rocker, "Music critics get their records for free so their opinions usually don't matter."

Killing the Undead - Again

2009-12-18T13:59:00.005Z

When Valve announced that Left 4 Dead 2 was in development some time ago, there were mixed reactions within the gaming community. Some were happy to hear of a second installment of this year's Online Game of the Year, the first being a huge success with both fans and critics. Although some people were slightly mifted that they did not spend more time nurturing Left 4 Dead 1, with the lack of DLC maps being rather fleeting and downplayed (Xbox 360 owners being rather annoyed that the PC version was given their downloadable content free but them being required to pay 540 Microsoft Points, however this WAS NOT Valve's decision).

Upon playing it I can only applaude Valve at another fine display of their work. Left 4 Dead 2 takes all the elements that made the first so enjoyable and capitalised on them, making them bigger and more badass than they were in the first. Understandably some people may just think that this Left 4 Dead with a fresh coat of paint, just with different characters and new maps. Thankfully they couldn't be more wrong. Left 4 Dead 2 features 4 new unique and comical characters, all with distinctive backgrounds, dialogue and attitudes. Valve gives you intense action with some dark humour injected into parts, with the characters occasionally mocking one another during the very sparce calm moments.

There are 4 new faces to play as in the campaigns: Coach (my personal favourite), a high school gym teacher that looks like Danny Glover if he let himself go and speaks in very much the same way (if you dont't know what I mean, please see Predator 2). Nick, a suave gambler that is slightly cocky but is still a solid team player. Rochelle, a hot head very much in the mould of Zoe from L4D 1 and finally Ellis, a friendly yet simple red neck who has an attitude like Francis in that shooting nearly everything alive pleases him no end.

The campaigns this time around still maintain the same "Movie" type style but with a much stronger narrative than before. In the first, it was unclear whether each campaign was linked or they were seperate ideas but now it is clearly shown that one follows on from where the previous finishes and the true finale is on The Parish campaign (Campaign 5). These stories are populated with new special infected (as if the first lot weren't bad enough) there are even more annoying super powered zombies to try and make you epic fail. The Jockey that takes control of a Survivour and steers him around in deadly areas populated with hundreds of infected. Spitter, a lanky woman who shoots dangerous acid that makes an area toxic for a short period, her ability mainly being designed to keep the survivours apart, maybe leaving one guy on his own and having to fend for himself until the acid subsides. The Charger, who wears dungerees (which is hilarious) and rams through the group to split them up. He also has the ability to pick up and carry one survivour a worrying amount of feet and them slam them into the ground over and over. One of his arms is also huge. Thought you might like to know that.....

In addition to this there are also uncommon infected, who don't have special abilities as such but do have something a little different about them. One is unique to each campaign, Clowns being confined to the Carnival where they have the ability to lead common zombies, Infected CEDA Agents have resilient suits and can use Boomer Bile, Army infected are unaffected by pistol bullets and Swampy Mudmen obscure your vision when they hit you. So there are plenty of dangerous undead mo fos to watch out for.

Valve's unique strength again comes from its random element generator and "The Director", an AI generator that seemingly controls the environment, chooses what special infected to spawn and where, when to launch a horde wave attack etc but has now been refined. Not only this, according to how fast or slow you are moving or how good or bad you are doing, your path to the holy safe room can be a straightforward path or a complex maze of constant corners. I think that element that made L4D 1 so replayable was the fact that you would never play the same game twice. Now this variety has been expandable, instead of just the standard SMG/M16 you are given a whole host of weapons, some of which look borrowed from a game featuring warfare of a very modern kind. Aww if I only I could remember the name of it......Never mind. You can keep your distance and pick off infected heads with a Sniper Rifle or sprint round giving the zombies the old 3 burst fire from a Scar-H. Melee weapons have also been introduced but these take the place of your pistol(s) so you must choose whether you want to twang heads with a guitar or take a Deagle on your travels.

All in all this game is a solid buy, Valve have outdone themselves once again, providing us with a new modern L4D which we can all get down to. If you do find yourself wondering whether to purchase a game where on the box art a zombie is giving you the peace sign, just remember, you get to kill zombies. Thousands of them. Over and over again. Plus the sight of a Tank in tight jeans is worth seeing because its just so funny.

Killing in the Name Of.. Good Music

2009-12-14T17:46:00.005Z

Ok, I thought I'd jump on the bandwagon. You may have heard of a reality TV programme called the X Factor. For those not in the know it's an annoying show where contestants compete for who has the biggest sob story, the judges fight over who can be the most controversial and Simon Cowell sees how much money he can rake in through week after week of telephone voting. Oh, and there's also a bit of singing thrown in too.

Now, every year that the X Factor has been on, the winner has gone on to receive the 'prestigious' title of Christmas Number One in the mainstream music charts through clever marketing and over-advertising. All a bit boring really if you ask me. Where's the competition if we all know already that whatshisface is going to win with his sappy, vomit inducing cover of a Miley Cyrus song? Miley bloody Cyrus. Has it really come to this?!

So, there's this little campaign to offer an alternative to the X Factor winner's single, in the form of Rage Against The Machine's Killing in the Name Of. Of the millions of alternative songs that could have been chosen to provide the nation with an antidote to this musical twaddle, I'm not too sure why they chose this one. Even so, it'd be quite refreshing to see if it ends up in the chart- alongside that slushy song by the Soldiers and Mariah Carey.

Let's face it, music today is more about making money than acute craftsmanship. More about shifting units than penning beautiful, catchy melodies, at least when it comes to pop music (Lady Gaga being a possible exception). So why not have some fun with it?

If you want to join in this experiment that's already received praise from the likes of 6 Music and NME Magazine, then go buy it on iTunes or Amazon THIS WEEK.

Dan Le Sac vs Scroobius Pip Can't Help But 'Get Better'

2009-12-09T10:46:00.006Z

After the huge success of 'Angles' everyone was waiting to see how Den Le Sac and Scroobius Pip could possibly top it. Every song was packed with catchy beats, thought provoking lyrics and left massive expectations for their following album.

Finally, the duo have released a little teaser for us all to ponder over until the album is released. The track is titled 'Get Better' and it doesn't disappoint. Not in the slightest! The song has stuck to the basic principles that has served them so well in the past. Dan Le Sac's addictive beats and bass lines fuse beautifully with Scroobius Pip's poetic and memorable lyrics.

You can hear 'Get Better' on BBC iPlayer for the next seven days and then it will be posted on Dan Le Sac's MySpace.

I'm sure many of you are crying out at your computer screens, "I WANT TO SEE THEM LIVE!". Well never fear. The hip-hop duo have announced that they will be performing at Bristol's very own O2 Academy next March.

To get more information about tickets go to www.o2academybristol.co.uk

Ranting and Review

2009-11-07T15:47:00.009Z

Getcha Freak On

Sensing lack of movie reviews on this blog, (which may I add are a fetish of mine), I decided that I’d go ahead and knock together one for you. I figured the most sensible thing to do would be to review the last film I watched which was X-Men Origins: Wolverine. I guess it’s a good thing that I have a lot to say about this movie then, isn’t it? So this is my first blog and movie review, spliced with a lot of nerd ranting a long the way. Enjoy.

Stepping back and attempting to analyse it from an entirely ‘non-comic book geek’ point of view, I can point out both the good and bad. The film in itself was well constructed with impressive special effects. The acting was better than passable and the script was well written. I found the storyline to be highly predictable, bar perhaps the ending (which was like WHOA, WTF DUDE, NOT EXPECTING THAT). One thing that narked me off a little as a viewer was the scene in with the actual ‘dead pool’ where they meld the ‘adamantium’ to Wolverine’s skeleton. Yes, movies are bound to have hiccups, but when I watched all the other X-Men films and we saw the shattered memories that Logan still had of the laboratory, I imaged some gritty, secretive underground place where illegal and gruesome experiments happen. They had clips of him looking at his new claws, mortified, with blood all over his hands. The tank water was green and the tank was dirty looking. It makes you ponder how the bloody hell he ended up there and made me really feel for him as a character. A shiny lab where a minutes worth of, admittedly unimaginable, pain was inflicted to avenge :Spoilers: the death of a girlfriend he’d known five minutes, makes me think: Oh. Okay then.

Jumping into nerd mode as a gal who loves her comic books; THIS IS ALL WRONG. I’m a huge fan of the X-Men films andf I’ll be the first to say that I’m not a big fan of Wolverine. I just never took to him. I do, however, freaking obsess over Deadpool (the character, not the tank thing). I knew I was going to watch the film anyhoodles because I like the X-Men films, but when I found out that Deadpool aka Wade Wilson was in it and being played by Ryan Reynolds, I made a noise somewhere between a cough and a gasp, then proceeded to fall off of my chair. Not only is Ryan the hottest human being in the whole of, like, earth, but his comedic talent, wit and superb improvisational skills share a direct parallel with Deadpool’s. No one else could play him. Yes, yes, he was played superbly. Ryan nailed the part and really captured the essence of Wade, Kat was impressed, blahdeblahdeblah. BUT HE WAS IN IT FOR ALL OF ABOUT 8 SECONDS. I watched the entirety of the film waiting for him to pop up somewhere again and did he? Yes. :Spoilers: Right at the end of the bloody film, replaced by a body double with laser eyes, the ability to teleport and with his mouth removed. Yeah, alright then. Its not like his nickname in the comics was Merc with the Mouth or anything and now he’s even had that taken away from him. He wasn’t nearly as deformed as he should have been, the guy was supposed to be riddled with cancer and tumours. The reason he ended up so powerful was cancer treatment gone-wrong. AND WHERE WAS THE BREAKING OF THE FORTH-WALL?! I won’t go into anymore detail then I have about him, or you’ll stop reading (if you haven’t already) but the effing up of Deadpool left me one severely pissed off little dork. Although him popping up LIKE THAT at the end was probably one of the only unpredictable bits in the whole of the film. I was NOT expecting that.

Not only did they bastardize Deadpool but they demolished Emma Frost’s character (that one who turns to diamond). Not only is she supposed to be a villain, she’s supposed to look like an absolute slut. Imagine if Paris Hilton we’re a blow up doll, with bigger boobs and wearing nothing but lingerie. You’d think that the media would jump at the chance of exploiting hot, half naked women.

In all fairness, I like what they did with the character of Gambit. I not sure what the other fans will think but I thought they made him passably like his character from the comics and undeniably cool. All his powers were the same, he looked similar, had the right accent and there was a lovely fight scene between him and Wolverine.

If I were to give a percentage out of ten for this film, it would probably be a five. Perhaps a six if I’m feeling generous, for lack of accuracy and serious predictability. The marks are for the enjoyment factor and special effects. It was entertaining I guess, I didn’t get horribly bored at any point and it’s a half decent spin off of the X-Men films. It would probably work better as a movie if it had nothing to do with the comics and stood alone as a film. The Deadpool fangirl in me is going to have to wait a couple of years for it, but it has been announced that a Deadpool film is being made for 2011/12 and Ryan is playing him! EXCITEMENT! Apparently its going to be absolutely accurate, complete with deformities and fourth-wall breaking HURRAH!!…

…I should have been born a boy. Probably as Sheldon from the Big-Bang Theory, proceeding re-reading this article.

Hope you enjoyed my review, now go do something constructive. I’m in the mood for some comic reading after all this. I’m off to go read my ‘Issue #19 of the Deadpool series’ which has just arrived this morning courtesy of eBay. Gosh, I’m such a nerd.

'LOVE' Trailer Revealed

2009-11-07T11:18:00.004Z

For many months forum-lovers have been debating and arguing their theories and thoughts about the Angels And Airwaves film, 'LOVE', but now we finally have a trailer for next year's Valentines day treat.

The film is about an astronaut's battle to save himself when left stranded alone in orbit as his life support systems begin to fade away, as does his sanity. Lee Miller's world within the International Space Station becomes one of extreme loneliness and claustrophobia until he makes a strange discovery aboard the ship. LOVE is driven by the powerful music of Angels And Airwaves and expresses man's need for connection and the overwhelming power of hope and belief.

The film is due to be released on Valentines day 2010 and will coincide with the release of their third album, also titled LOVE. After the immense success of the band's two previous albums, We Don't Need To Whisper and I-Empire, LOVE is one of the most anticipated albums of 2010.

So for all of you who are shaking with anticipation, here it is .... LOVE

ODST: Original Dynasty or Shockingly Terrible?

2009-11-03T14:51:00.006Z

Your alone. In the dead of night. Stuck in a city you've never set foot in before and the things around you want to rip you limb from limb. No not Manchester, its the city of New Mombasa which is where the event of Bungie's latest installment in the Halo saga, Halo 3: ODST takes place. Taking place somewhere between the events of Halos 2 and 3, ODST puts you in control of a rookie Orbital Drop Shock Trooper named (wait for it).......Rookie. Alright, so we never really find out his name or see his face, but he still looks pretty cool and is a nice break from playing the same old Spartan Master Chief, however cool Sierra 117 may be.

After a botched deployment, you as the rookie are separated from the rest of your squadron and wake up 6 hours later, emerging into the city at night and have to search for them. This night time scenario serves as a type of hub, and depends on you finding various objects at certain locations, maybe a broken sniper rifle or destroyed gauss cannon, after which u flashback to how the object ended up there, jumping back in time a few hours and taking the role of each of your squad members. The focus on story-telling in this edition is dynamic, clever and original, breaking away from the traditional linear story line plots of most FPSs. Even though the docile environment of the night may seem like you have missed all the action, the flashback roles of your squad that take place during the day are full of fast paced action and shooting. It can range from steering a Scorpion tank through the narrow roads and streets, flying a Banshee in and around the skyscrapers to fighting your way to your ship 100 billion feet off the ground (the numbers may need to be checked). Whatever the situation, Bungie seem to have covered all their bases and in all fairness they've done it quite well.

The inclusion of the new Firefight mode, a mode similar to the Horde in Gears of War 2, sees you try to survive waves and waves of Covenant forces who will attempt to plasma your shields, sticky grenade your face and Gravity Hammer your unmentionables. This mode (like Horde) is not just that you get more and more Grunts running at you. For starters, the infamous skulls of the Halo universe are turned on, with more activating after each round is finished, each round consisting of 5 waves and each Set consisting of 3 rounds. So to recap, 5 Waves = 1 Round - 3 Rounds = 1 Set. Each wave within the round gets progressively harder, with Wave 1 consisting of grunts and jackals, with the final waves containing Hammer and Fuel Rod Brutes as well as everyone's most hated party guest, Hunters. This mode is obviously designed to replace the missing multiplayer matchmaking, that instead taken care of by the addition of the 2nd disc which includes every single map to date as well as the unreleased half of the Mythic Maps. Designed to be taken on by you and 3 friends will obviously be much better and 20 times more enjoyable than you having to make a stand all by yourself with nothing but a Plasma Pistol.

All in all, this is a tidy little game. The campaign is a decent amount of fun, albeit much shorter than the other Halo campaigns, but still good enough to keep people interested. 30 pounds for 2 discs worth of Halo is a neat price but if you have Halo 3 and also purchased the DLC multiplayer bundles, you're kind of paying for it again, which will put many people off. But if your a Halo fan, you will probably add this to your collection.

A Happy Return To Moscow! Next Stop, Liverpool ...

2009-10-22T11:07:00.003+01:00

The early kick-off last night in the Champions League group stages saw Manchester United return to the very same stadium they experienced Champions League glory in a nail biting penalty shoot out against Chelsea, two seasons back. Winning 1-0 against CSKA Moscow to put them 5 points ahead of second in the group and it also saw United equal Ajax's long standing away record, remaining undefeated in 14 consecutive Champions League away fixtures.

It was a match very much restricted by the artificial turf, with both sides opting to play short passes with and not taking any risks. The narrowness of the CSKA formation allowed a lot of room for Nani and Fabio to exploit down the left hand side. It was a traditional Manchester United away performance in Europe, very patient, lots of possesion and in the end just one goal separated the two sides with Berbatov's flick-on finding new-boy Valencia at the far post to strike the ball past CSKA captain, Igor Akinfeev.

A strong performance by United but now the attention focuses on Sunday's fixture against a Liverpool side who are still shaky after a late 2-1 loss to Lyon and a controversial wonder-strike by a beach ball. Liverpool owner George Gillett has today come out and stated that Rafa has their full support and backing, but a loss on Sunday would leave the Merseyside team 10 points behind the champions and surely out of the title race.

United seem to have adapted to life without Ballon D'or winner Cristiano Ronaldo and Carlos Tevez, however it doesn't look like Liverpool can even cope without Steven Gerrard and Fernando Torres, let alone adapt!

The Top 5 Guitar Hero Games

2009-10-09T10:11:00.006+01:00

If your torn between which game you should rock your socks off to, allow me to lend some help. What with the recent arrival of Guitar Hero 5 and The Beatles: Rock Band, it seems that many people are rushing out to buy the latest installments when actually, you could probably get an older, better and cheaper game with much better songs on it. I shall tell you (in my opinion) which are the top five Guitar Hero games to buy, allowing you to drum, sing and strum yourself silly. Let us begin at the beginning (great place to begin)...

1. Guitar Hero Metallica

Dear lord there has never been more an intense shredding session than GH Metallica! One of the best and most intense bands of the 20th century has a whole setlist devoted to their greatness! I have chosen this first as I think it is the most fun and has some of my favourite songs on it. Getting to play things like Fade to Black, Fight Fire with Fire, Wherever I May Roam, Mercyful Fate and Fuel makes my fingers orgasm with delight. Activision has paid great homage to the band, with incredible likeness and detail going into everything from Lar's drumsticks to Rob's qudad ponytails, which they failed to do back in Guitar Hero: Aerosmith, with Lars giving his sly smirks, James being intensly central and interacting with the crowd and Rob and Kirk just being immense. This is only for the hardcore expert player or a true Metallica fan, as playing on Medium is slightly bittersweet in my view as you can play the song but know your missing probably half the notes out. Not only does this game feature the gods of metal but it also features bands that have either inspired or been inspired by Metallica, such bands as Queen, Mastadon, Machine Head, System of a Down and Bob Seger. This game probably won't be for everyone, but in my view is the best GH game Activision have made.

2. Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock

This was the first ever GH game I owned, the one that sparked my love affair with the 5 coloured buttons. This game is a great mix of difficulties, varied songs and has unlimited playability. There's something in there for everyone, from the chillaxed Indie fan (When You Were Young by The Killers, Reptilia by The Strokes and Helicopter by Bloc Party), to the old school rock and roll people (Cities on Flame by Blue Oyster Cult, Rock and Roll All Night by KISS and Rock You Like a Hurricane by The Scorpions) to the intense metal heads (tracks like One by Metallica, Raining Blood by Slayer and Before I Forget by Slipknot). This game has all the necessary ingredients to keep every type of Guitar Hero happy. The achievements aren't bad either, and also has the best and easiest hit system to date, not to mention DLC packs like DragonForce, Muse and Velvet Revolver.

3. Guitar Hero World Tour

This isn't really one of my favourites but I think it would suit most people as the songs are the most varied mix. Very different music types all blended into one setlist and plus this was the first introduction of all instruments in a Guitar Hero game (Rock Band's Rock in a Box being the first). Not many songs keep me happy on that game so I'm found to be playing Assassin by Muse, Trapped Under Ice by Metallica and Pull Me Under by Dream Theater over and over, but would recommend this for most people as this is slightly less intense and easier to pick up and play than GH3: LoR. The size of the setlist is huge compared to the previous installments, and the range of online modes is a nice change of pace from the usual Face-off, Pro Face-off and Co-op modes, with the introduction of new instruments allowing each song to have 3 seperate note tracks and allowing veteran players to get to grips with guitar, drums and vocals.

4. Guitar Hero 5

The latest installment is probably a decent buy, with 85 songs by 83 artists showing that Activision is really casting its net to the far corners of society to capture anyone and everyone it can. Music ranging from Bob Dylan to Arctic Monkeys and Blink 182 sounds like a good idea on paper with the company trying to please everyone, but the lack of focus here is a let down for me. However, the simplicity of the game makes it very user friendly, even for people who are over 40 and have a phobia of the joypad. There is just one big main menu, with the confusing to navigate mini menus that littered the previous titles being removed and the game being revamped to make it more appealing to newcomers without offending the hardcores. The drop in drop out play is a welcome feature, with your friends able to just join in, pick and instrument and jump right in with you. The tedious procedure of playing the early, easy and somewhat mundance songs in career mode has been eliminated and the career is now based on how many stars you can earn, allowing you to have alot more control and overall, fun. The in-song and band challenges will keep the addicts and completionists coming back for more. Overall I would this is a safe option as your first buy, but wouldn't being up 'til 3am on ebay outbidding some guy from poland to get it

5. Guitar Hero II

This is very old school, and so it obviously does has its flaws but you can tell that Activision, Harmonix and RedOctane had real bash and putting together this title. The hit system is very difficult to nail, as a slight mistime of a hammer on can shoot your note streak straight out of the sky, also it is very hard to differentiate between what is a normal note and what is a hammer-on/pull-off due to the poor and sketchy visuals but I suppose that is not what the game is about, it's about rocking. This has a decent mix of songs, both challenging and fun. The major downside is that the tracks you play aren't the master versions, so they will be the re-recorded versions that the companies themselves have done. This doesnt really affect the guitar track but vocal differences is blatantly obvious (listen to the version of Sweet Child O Mine and you'll see). The lack of online co-op really hurts the game, with your friends who own the game not being able to play with you online is real smack in the nether regions. However, when all is said and done, what matters on these games is the music and this game (considering when it was made) is a real gem, plus it has the best working guitar they've made so far.

Well I hope these concise and, fairly arrousing paragraphs, helped u in any decision making you have to do, or it may have been some non-sensical and intoxicated ramblings of a man with far too much time to spare but nonetheless, it was a pleasure.

England Failing To Impress

2009-09-10T13:10:00.008+01:00

The entire nation had high hopes for England succeeding in the one day series with Australia after their inspirational Ashes victory. We were putting aside the fact that England are notoriously disappointing when it comes to the one day form of the game because we had the momentum.

'Momentum' was the key word in the build up to this post-Ashes series. However as the England team are proving, momentum can't make up for a severe lack of quality within the team.

The one series series started off poorly with both Twenty-twenty games being completely rained off, bar the Australian innings in the first match, but the 50 overs matches was when the real action began and England were going to "send the Aussies back empty handed" according to many fans. But we are still yet to see any 'action' from this specialist England side!

The batting line-up continues to look fragile without Kevin Pieterson with the likes of Ravi Bopara and Owais Shah still not producing the big innings' required from them at this level and the most experience batsman there, Paul Collingwood, doesn't seem capable of hitting it off the square!

I don't think anyone was expecting a fantastic performance from England, due to their poor history in the one day game, but I think we were all expecting a bit more fight and passion coming from this Ashes winning side. The series isn't finished so there is still a chance of saving some dignity, but the fact is that England's performances as of yet have been much like the English summer, disappointing.

We're Back!

2009-09-08T20:13:00.002+01:00

Smell that? It's the scent of top quality journalism!

Over the summer holidays, we spent every waking moment thinking of how we can make The New Wave an even bigger success after our great first year, and we came up with ..... Well, nothing really!

But never fear! We are back and it won't be long until our journalistic-meat is making love to your screens once again!

DLC = We're Not Made of Money

2009-07-21T08:30:00.003+01:00

Just before I begin to properly write this, I should let you know I own an Xbox 360 and have done for 5 years (and I'm happy with my choice) so I'm going to be writing this from a Microsoft point of view. I won't exclude any PS3 owners who read this and I won't "diss" you or your console, I'm just letting you know which side of the fence I'm on.

This is a post to all the hardcore, proper old-school gamers out there, people who actually work the behinds off to get Achievements and/or Trophies. Over the years, games have, on the whole, been either retail 1000 Gamerscore or have an additional 1250G to get. However, over the last year or so, Downloadable Content has just become ridiculous. Game scores going up to random and ridiculous numbers - Fallout 3 = 1450 (so far!) - Gears of War 2 = 1425 (so far!) - Halo 3 = 1750 - Its pandemonium I tell you!

I didn't have a problem with DLC to begin with, I actually quite welcomed the idea. Developers had a good idea after the game had been released which they wanted to incorporate and so released it as DLC a few months after the release for the fee of 800 Microsoft Points, even a few extra achievements to go with it. Now however, instead of thinking of ideas after the game has come out, developers try to think of DLC beforehand, ready to charge people extra before the game itself has even come out - DLC is announced before the f******* retail game is even on the shelves!

There are some DLC packs worth paying for e.g. pretty much all of Fallout 3's packs (which I think is one of the best games ever made and doesn't always get the respect it deserves, people escape the Vault and give up) Point Lookout in the Swamps with Inbreds, Broken Steel changing the ending to the game completely, The Pitt allowing you to liberate the slaves of Pittsburgh and Operation: Anchorage sending you "back in time" to relive the freedom of Alaska from Chinese forces, the originality of the content was admirable. Also the maps of Nazi Zombies on CoD: World at War are also very much worth the money, a story generating out it (which I applaud) was what sold it for me but the carnage and fun of the never-ending game mode provides hours of enjoyment.

Now however, every single game released now has DLC ready and some games which were released over a year ago are bringing out content now. Not being rude, but double you tee eff (WTF). I just think game designers + developers need to see we aren't made of money, we can't pay for every single DLC pack on every game and its very annoying for achievement getters when a game we maxed months ago gets 12 new DLC achievements.

Any 360 Gamers out there let me know what you think but if your one of those people that just play Call of Duty 4 and FIFA 09 with a Gamerscore between 500 to 2000 G, don't leave a comment because it'll just be something like "M16 BeAsT! 4 Life - I use JuGGerNauT so What?"

If you want to add me on Xbox LIVE my Gamertag is xJimiHendrix92x

New Generation of Comedy

2009-07-21T07:48:00.004+01:00

Due to the shitty weather destroying my tv signals, I have recently been forced to take refuge in Internet TV. Luckily, a few weeks ago, a friend of mine introduced me to a show I heared alot about but never remembered to watch it. This show is called The Inbetweeners. Some of you may now be saying "Oh yeah I watch it all the time" but there may be a fair number of people reading this thinking "Oh yeah I've heard of that but I haven't seen it............yet". Allow me to enlighten you.

It revolves around the central character of William McKenzie, affectionately known by his classmates as "Briefcase Wanker". His dad has left his mum (why, I do not know) and he now has to finish off his education at a normal state comprehensive. Fortunately for him, three pupils befriend him. However at the same time, these three aren't at the top of the popularity tree. Simon, Jay and Neill all welcome Will in to their tiny group, in which they all discuss one dominant topic: Sex. The simple formula of boys trying to shag girls works brilliantly thanks to the performances of the 4 young cast members. The boys all differ slightly in their group and it is well balanced. Also, you can often compare some of your friends to one of the four.

Will provides the narrative and the perspective from which we get the story. He is well mannered and brown-noses the teachers and parents. The insults bounce off him since he's had so much abuse but most of the time brings it on himself, like wearing a tight black vest top which usually buff gay body builders wear. Simon is probably my favourite, the all-rounder of the group. He is nice to girls but enjoys sex like the others and joins in with the dirt talk. However, he is obsessed with trying to get with a girl named Carli, but his romantic gestures often backfire hilariously. Jay is pure dirt, always focusing on girls as fuckable objects and non-stop talks about sex and often insults the others for no reason, either saying he'd fuck Will's mum or how he'd stay away from Neill's dad. He exaggerates his sexual escapades whenever possible which Will often instantly dismisses as bogus. Finally there's Neill, a gentle but confused soul. He is Jay's right hand man and usually follows his lead. Just as sex crazed as the rest, Neill's happy face and child-like mannerisms make him the comic relief.

What I like most about the show, is that these 4 boys have an amazingly bad (and funny) time doing things such as going to London for a night out or going on a field trip to a seaside town but they're not ridiculously farfetched either, so the credibility remains which I think is important.

There are also a few other characters who make an appearence who provide classic moments. Neill's dad (Whose not bent) constantly denies his homosexuality, as does Neill, but then eventually gets called a "Bum-der" by Will after a few drinks. Will's mum (possibly the definition of the word MILF) is often the focal point of the boy's fantasies. Simon's parents (his dad especially) who openly discuss their sexual relations in front of and to him, something that would make us all turn away in disgust, to be honest I'd rather mix electricity and water than parents and sex. Gilbert, the school's headteacher, who doesn't take bullshit from anyone and also doesn't believe in grassing. Donovan, the bully who terrorises the boys every now and then, mostly Will since he somehow stole Charlotte Hingecliff AKA Charlotte Bigjuggs off him. But my favourite of all is Patrice, Simon's french exchange who quickly rises above the boy's popularity levels and even manages to shag Charlotte before Will does, all in one episode. He barely says anything, chain smokes and wears a leather jacket. The man is amazing.

The best thing I think I like about this though is that I feel it's captured our generations sense of humour perfectly. For instance, when Will shouts at some seagulls out of nowhere, or when Jay shoots a flare up in the air when they're only about 50ft away from the harbour in broad daylight, these moments I find for whatever reason amazingly funny. I feel that my parents or anyone over the age of 30 probably wouldn't find The Inbetweeners funny, but I don't think they're supossed to. With our generation there has a evolved a new sense of humour I feel, one which finds some of the most peculiar things just lol worthy.

If you haven't already, check out The Inbetweeners at 4 on Demand where you can watch all episodes of both series.

Final Day Drama Captures Ashes Spirit!

2009-07-13T15:21:00.004+01:00

What an advert for test cricket! With the recent surge of Twenty/20 cricket, people were beginning to question how exciting test cricket is in comparison, however, the fifth day at Cardiff proved how nail-biting test cricket is, and how special the Ashes truly are!

At the start of the day England had a decent chance of saving the test match and keeping the series level at nil-nil. All they needed to do was to bat the day out, and with captain Andrew Strauss and Kevin Pieterson at the crease it seemed like a relatively simple job. However, the criticism of Pieterson's first innings dismissal obviously got to the ex-captain as he left a straight one on off-stump and was bowled by Ben Hilfenhaus, dramatically reducing any chances of avoiding defeat. The skipper soon followed as his attempted cut-shot edged behind to Brad Haddin off of Nathan Hauritz's bowling. It seemed like this would belong to Australia.

England's late middle order put up a fight against the Aussie's attack, with Paul Collingwood top scoring with 74 off of an astonishing 344 deliveries. In spite of this strong display from Collingwood, wickets continued to fall around him. Prior displayed a moment of truly terrible batting when he edged one to first slip. Hauritz's second wicket of the innings. Flintoff gave a bit of stability to the batting line-up, lasting 89 balls but went feeling for a ball, wide of off-stump and edging it behind.

With the wickets of Swann and Broad falling, England found themselves in a situation where they were relying on James Anderson and Monty Panesar to see the side home, with a new ball just around the corner. The pace of Siddle was not enough to break through Monty's defence and the introduction of spin gave Anderson a chance to take the lead and knock 10 minutes off of the remaining playing time. This meant that if England could last until 6.40 pm, then defeat would be avoided.

Australia went for spin at both ends in the form of Nathan Hauritz and Marcus North, with the intention of fitting more overs into the remaining minutes. With 5 minutes left and the crowd cheering every dot ball as if it was a six. England's twelfth-man came sprinting onto the pitch with a change of gloves for Anderson. Ponting's face was a portrait of anger and frustration with the blatant attempts of time wasting and the twelfth-man soon left the pitch. A few overs later and the twelfth-man was back on with yet another change of gloves for Anderson, however this time he was being followed by the England physio who walked out, spoke to Panesar and walked off the pitch again. A much needed exchanging of words no doubt!

All this drama and tension set a perfect atmosphere for the final moments of this first test. The clock struck 6.40 pm and after some discussion between the batsmen, Ricky Ponting and the umpires, play ended and England had saved the test match in the most nail-biting finish to an Ashes test since Edgbaston 2005.

Only in an Ashes series will you find that grit and determination to never back down and that 'never say die' spirit. Day five at Cardiff is what the Ashes is all about!

Cantona, Sheringham, Larsson ... Owen?

2009-07-07T11:59:00.006+01:00

Throughout his Old Trafford reign, Sir Alex Ferguson has had a habit of bringing in older, seemingly past their best players and reviving their career. The players that stick out are the likes of 'The King' Eric Cantona, Teddy Sheringham and Henrik Larsson, but could Michael Owen join that list? Or will he struggle to compete at the highest level again?

Michael Owen arrives at the club on a free transfer after his contract with Newcastle ran out, ending an injury plagued four seasons with the club. Upon signing he said "It feels great. I never even had it in my wildest dreams", but the big question is whether his injuries are behind him and he is ready to take his place in a top Premiership team and the England team.

Questions were also being asked of Alex Ferguson when he bought the likes of Cantona and Sheringham, but they went on to become two of the best strikers in the club's history. Cantona went on to help United win the Premier League and the FA Cup on more than one occasion. As for Sheringham, well he scored one of the most important goals in the club's history, a last minute equalizer to set up a dramatic treble victory in the '99 Champions League final.

Now Owen has a chance to prove all of his critics wrong. There is no doubting that he is one of the best finishers in Europe, and what he has lost in pace he has gained in experience and intelligence. However, his injuries still cast over him and raise questions about his ability to perform consistently. We wont know until the season starts but he possesses one thing that can't be lost, a true striker's instinct.

RIP Michael Jackson 1958 - 2009

2009-07-01T14:27:00.003+01:00

I was playing an intense game of CoD World at War Nazi Zombies with my friends online. The storms outside made the atmosphere even more intense. Lightning flashing and the thunder shouting was epic. However, the happy mood of my friends and I blocked out the dark world around us. I then heard a knock at my door, my auntie poked her head round and simply said "Michael Jackson has died". I went hollow.

It took me some time to process the information. My initial reaction was denial. I thought "No this can't be right". But after frantically rushing to the nearest news channel it was clear that the King of Pop had passed away. I post this article as a mere tribute to him, a tribute that is just one among many that have been created by a world in mourning. Facebook groups created, people buying his merchandise, radio stations playing his songs pretty much 24/7 - Everybody feels some sense of loss.

Now I understand that there were various controversial issues involving his personal life, accusations of child molestation, acts with his own children etc. You either take two views on this: You either understand that everyone is human, makes mistakes and see that clearly the man was confused thanks to his own abusive childhood which was stolen from him - or you make just out of order jokes and repeat the words "Pedo Pedo Pedo, Pedo with white glove" which I'm sure at least one asshole will leave on the comments section. If you do the latter I think you are incredibly narrow minded and you possibly have no shame (In short, you are Paris Hilton).

Remember him for his musical genius. Remember his incredible live performances. Remember his unique dance moves. Don't tell me you never tried to Moonwalk - we all have. All I can really say is that he will be sorely missed, from the Moonwalking of Billie Jean, the ABCs of the Jackson 5 to the scary video of Thriller, I think we all miss MJ, May He Rest In Peace.

Banksy vs Bristol Museum

2009-06-24T15:07:00.026+01:00

Upon entering Bristol Museum, after a large but fast-moving queue, I was greeted by a vandalised ice-cream truck and a happy policeman riding a rocking horse to and fro. All of which gave me the sense that I was in for one of the first museum trips that I could honestly say was enjoyable!

The first floor is Banksy dominated and split into two main sections. One section consisting of canvas-based artworks, and the other featuring caged, 3-D items.

The canvas-based section questions modern society (as is Banksy's style), and picks up on particular topics such as the police force and modern politicians. Often challenging the stereotype of the police being "tough" by presenting them in varying situations, such as running through a meadow holding hands, or (as seen above) riding a children's play-park ride. What was most memorable and eye-catching for me was the wall-sized portrait of the House of Parliament. In which all politicians were replaced with monkeys (rather fittingly), obviously picking up on certain outrages stories that I shan't mention now.

The second section was very surreal. Monkeys painting, caged families of hot-dogs and swimming fish fingers. Very surreal indeed. Once again, these were not just random pieces of art that Banksy created for the purpose of humour. They all expressed strong messages about modern society and all of it's faults. It made me think of social issues that I have never put a great deal of thought into before. Issues such as animal testing, displayed visually through a Rabbit applying make-up in front of a bathroom mirror (see right). These thought provoking tendencies were a running theme throughout the exhibit.

That wasn't the end of the Banksy fun. Far from it. The rest of the museum was littered with examples of Banky's work, whether it was a clever adaption to another artist's work or the odd rubber sex-toy (that's correct, rubber sex-toy!). Not his most thought provoking piece of art but humorous non-the-less.

As a keen Banksy fan, I could not pass up the opportunity to see an exhibit displaying the graffiti artist's genius, and it was far more than I could have expected. As I was leaving, taking it all in one last time, I noticed the guest book. Words could not express how much I enjoyed my visit. I simply wrote, "Awesome".

Screamers aren't funny

2009-06-24T14:44:00.004+01:00

I was recently roaming YouTube, probably one of my most viewed sites ever in the history of the internet (along with Facebook), searching for live performances by Jimi Hendrix, songs on Guitar Hero on Expert 100% or funny things that make me laugh like Scrubs or WWE moments. I typed in to search Float On by Modest Mouse. I eventually found a good quality version on my phone by some weird guy who had made a video containing the lyrics and some very, very dire animations to accompany these words. Anyway, I allowed the video to play, whacked the phone in my pocket and continued playing on my Xbox 360 (Best Console Ever - Bar the N64).

Then, as I was merrily killing my enemies, an almighty scream which lasted over 9 seconds blared out into my eardrums, sending a ripple through my body. The song then continued on but with me mortified.

I would like to make this clear as of now. Screamers are not funny. They never were and they never wil be. They are made by people who clearly have nothing decent to put on YouTube so they just want to ruin the reputation of the site. Stop making Screamers. STOP IT NOW!

The End of a Silver-Coated Era

2009-06-11T16:03:00.006+01:00

It's finally over. More than 12 months of speculation have come to an end with Manchester United accepting an enormous sum of £80 million for Cristiano Ronaldo. This signing follows the recent acquisition of Kaka from AC Milan to Real Madrid and SkySports Spanish correspondent, Guillem Balague, believes that they are not finished yet and David Villa is next on their shopping list.

The United number 7 has had a long career at the club, arriving from Sporting Lisbon in August 2003 for a fee of approximately £12.24 million. His time at Man United hasn't always been filled with goals-galore and Ballon d'Or awards, in his first season he recorded 6 goals from his 40 appearances, and it wasn't until the 2005/06 season that he reached double figures. The end of that season saw the World Cup in which Portugal knocked-out England and the Portuguese winger seemed to have fell out with Wayne Rooney. This sparked rumours that Ronaldo would not return to Manchester, out of fear that he would be greeted with hostility. Despite the speculation, Cristiano returned to a warm welcome at the club and all thoughts of Wayne Rooney not being happy in the same team as Ronaldo were threw out of the window as the two formed a fantastic partnership which saw the United number 7 score 23 goals which contributed to the club's triumph in the league.

The best was still to come for Cristiano as the following season saw him named as Portugal's captain and his club winning the league and the Champions League double, with him scoring an outstanding 42 goals in 49 games. This brilliant achievement earned Ronaldo the Ballon d'Or, making him one of the few players in Manchester United's history to achieve this great award.

Cristiano Ronaldo is truly one of the greats in the history of the club, and his contributions over the years will not be forgotten. No man is irreplaceable, and no one is bigger than the club, however this is one man that will cause difficulty when searching for his replacement. Here is a tribute to one of the best players in the Premier League's history.....

Now the United fans must bid farewell to their Portuguese prince. However, as many fans will tell you, exciting times are ahead.

iRack

2009-06-10T20:04:00.006+01:00

I'm sure you will agree with me when I say that the whole situation with Iraq has become a bit of a joke. It's not getting any better over there, yet British and American troops keep getting plowed in like herds of Sheep!

We are massive fans of comedy here at The New Wave, and American based comedy show Mad TV have supplied a light-hearted take on the situation in Iraq. I give you ... the iRack!

Hope you enjoyed that as much as I did!

WTF?

2009-06-05T12:33:00.001+01:00

Possibly the freakiest music video I've seen in my life. MGMT never cease to surprise it seems, I don't know which is more scary, the demons and monsters goggling at the toddler or the look of pure terror on his face.

Who needs Sesame Street when you have these guys?

Heart Warming

2009-06-02T22:25:00.002+01:00

If the stress of exams is getting you down, there is simply one answer.

Please watch this:

Life is good again...

The Master of Puppets Have Returned!

2009-06-02T12:10:00.004+01:00

I am, of course talking about the new Guitar Hero Metallica game. Upon turning it on you hear the legend that is James Hetfield (the lead singer of Metallica) scream the words "Metallica, is here!!" and at that point it hit me that I wasn't just playing a game, I was being given a chance to fulfill my dream of playing on stage with Metallica. Yes, I realise that I'm not actually playing on stage with Metallica but it's the closest I'll ever come!

As this is a branch off game from Guitar Hero World Tour, the features do not differ to any great extent. You still have the options of 'career', 'quickplay', 'rock star creator', etc. After accessing the quickplay option with anticipation I was speechless to see the endless list of awesome metal-tracks, My Apocalypse, Enter Sandman, One, Cyanide. I couldn't believe it! I was pleasantly surprised to see not only Metallica songs, but Toxicity by System Of A Down, Tuesday's Gone by the legendary Lynyrd Skynyrd and many many more.

Moving on to the career mode and I am glad to tell you that it is much more reminiscent of the Guitar Hero 3 story. You play songs individually and no longer in sets of 4, 5 or 6, and there seems to be more of a story line within the game, unlike Guitar Hero World Tour where you just played gigs with no real plot. I don't want to reveal too much about the story but I was pleased to see a return of the daemon manager from Guitar Hero 3.

I have often complained that Guitar Hero games of the past have featured too many bands that don't deserve to be placed under the banner of 'Guitar Hero', R.E.M being one of those bands. However, this problem is not evident in Guitar Hero Metallica, and that makes this game the best Guitar Hero game I have ever played.

Slow Posting

2009-05-20T09:44:00.002+01:00

We would like to apologise for the lack of articles that may occur over study leave. The exams are piling on and as a result of this, we will not be able to post articles at the epic rate that we have been of late.

Good luck with your exams.

We will be back to our sexy best very soon!

Talking TV - 03

2009-05-12T22:53:00.006+01:00

...Nauseatingly needless,

...Critically crunching,

...An arrogant analysis

(right...that's enough, ^suggestions on a postcard please)

It's come to my attention my last two blarticles (yes I went there, blog+article) have been rather rantastic (rant +fanta...you got it) thus swaying my thoughts to write something a bit more positive. I thought I'd give it a go. A problems occurs when I start to think of things on television that I actually enjoy, but none the less I decided on two.

Drama : THE WIRE

The Wire is an American drama series which revolves around the city, culture and people of Baltimore. The series was written and produced by a former Baltimore pollice officer, David Simon. To say this is a just another police drama is a stonking under-statement, The Wire is the best thing to come out of American television in my lifetime, topped only by DEADWOOD. I have a theory about this, being that some of the big roles such as the part of Jimmy McNaulty, a witty Irish-American detective, or Stringer Bell, intelligent buisness man who happens to be the brains behind the biggest drug gang in Baltimore are both played by British actors, Dominic West and Idris Elba respectfully. The vast cast and shocking realism of The Wire fully initiates the viewer into the story, I bought the season 1 boxset and ploughed through the 13 hour exstravaganza in a few very very late nights. I cannot stress enough the genius of The Wire, if guns, swearing, witty one-liners, complex plot lines and memorable characters are something you are craving from your telebox then switch off Britain Has Got Alot of Idoits or whatever it's called, and march yourself to somewhere you can purchase The Wire, crack out the red bull, stay up until you can hear your alarm going off in your room and do no revision. Alternatively the first season of The Wire is starting/started on BBC 2. The only reason The Wire hasn't been giving it's just amount of praise is down to the fact the majorirty of the cast are black, a great disgrace against the production of fantastic television.

I wonder if the size of image I use will be interperated as how strongly I recomend The Wire, let's see.

Comedy : FLIGHT OF THE CONCHORDS

Unlike The Wire I feel I don't need to encourage the addition of Flight of The Conchords to reader's "Favourite TV Shows" section on their undoubtly existing facebook profiles as much . It basically comes down to two factors, do you like the dead-pan brilliance of Peep Show? Do you like the awkward musical numbers in The Mighty Boosh? if you answered "yes" to both of these questions then Flight of The Conchords it's most certainly for you. The show itself is written so very well, the timing and on screen presence of Bret McKenzie and Jermaine Clement is truely spectacular and in my opinion is everything I enjoy from The Mighty Boosh without the pretentious overtones. If unsure about this show, get on youtube and watch some of their live stuff, it's to be marvelled at. it'll make you love New Zealand. Fact.

GET ON MY TELEBOX!

Total Wipeout US and UK - People falling over, but glad to just be on the telebox, brilliant, keep the cretins coming is what I say.

Compare The Meerkat - Whoever came up with this needs to be given a medal, the MERE manipulation of language is just so admirable, as for the 3D meerkat...words cannot describe it, well they can. but I'm tired now.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I feel a bit sick from all the positivity in this blarticle (the more you read it the more you love it, right? right.) so I'm drawing it to a close, see you next week, where I will be discusing MP's Expenses and the EU.

not really. relax.

The Plastic Seat Company Take Their Talents To The Streets

2009-05-11T17:04:00.007+01:00

As many of you know, here at The New Wave we love new talent. We've introduced you all to up and coming bands like Ascari and Oceans Between Us, and now one of my personal favourites, The Plastic Seat Company, have caught my eye once again with their live street performance.

The welsh based comedy group are always looking for weird and wacky ways to grab the public's attention and the latest attempt can only be described as 'genius'. The location? Cardiff. The purpose? To disturb! Here it is, enjoy!

Hope that tickled your funny button as much as it did mine! Remember, The New Wave is the only place you can view 100% raw talent!

Blood, Guts and Little Girls - Its F.E.A.R 2

2009-05-07T21:14:00.006+01:00

Little Girls are officially much scarier than anything. I never played the first F.E.A.R or F.E.A.R Files but I was very aware of the main antagonist, namely Alma. A creepy little girl who is very much like the girl from the movie The Ring. I was also very worried when I found out that the developers that made F.E.A.R 2 also made the Condemned games. I was already scared I hadn't even put the disc in the tray.

F.E.A.R 2 is a First Person Shooter that revolves around Sgt. Michael Becket, a Soldier in the First Encounter Assault Recon (F.E.A.R) Squad who is sent in to arrest a woman named Genivive Artiside, who is responsible for something called Project Harbinger. Harbinger is a programme involving turning soldiers in puppets who are controlled telepathically from a Psychic Commando (intense stuff ain't it?). Anyway, you play the guy who didn't get all mentally messed up by getting exposed to all the psychosis stuff whereas all your pals freaked out and couldn't take it. Now I didn't fully understand the story, so I'm probably going to have to Wikipedia it and find out what happened in the first game but until then I'll put it as simply I as I think I can: This psycho woman Alma is hunting you down because you're a threat to her, you have to get to this device to "amplify your brainwaves and cause her's to overload". Now that's the story taken care of, I can tell you what I thought.

F.E.A.R 2 is pretty good shoot 'em up fun. Progressively getting harder, enemies getting tougher, more powerful weapons becoming available etc. The story is a bit hard to follow but I think it would make more sense if you played the first game (I didn't as I was put off by the Achievements). There is a very spooky, dark atmosphere about the game, even outside in the lighter areas you still walk around corners cautiously with your gun at the ready. A lack of music when playing really helps the tension as every little sound makes you turn around behind you to make sure "she" isn't there. A nice touch is that you can carry 4 weapons of any power e.g. You could have a Flamethrower, Rocket Launcher, Assault Rifle and a Sniper, and 4 Grenade Types, so explosive fun times. You even get to roam around in a mini Mech Suit, Transformers Style, and blow things and no Mo Fo can stop you. Every boy's dream. You also enter a Bullet Time Slow Motion mode and take out loads of enemies quick as a flash without getting hit but it is limited (obviously).

It's a pretty solid campaign with 14 Missions of pure ruin ur boxers moments, intense gunfights and general FPS fun. I think the horrible thing is that there are small moments, where bodies get dragged into a room and then disappear or a light falls down from the ceiling. Nothing threatening happens but you know something sooner or later is going hit you.

All in all, I would recommend this game. As long as you don't mind creepy.....creepy little girls.

Where Is Our Arena !?!

2009-05-07T15:00:00.002+01:00

In December 2007, plans to build a 10,000-seat arena in Bristol were sadly abandoned. The reasons for this injustice were that the ever growing costs to develop an arena in the area could not be fully justified if publicly funded. At the time of abandonment the predicted costs for development were roughly reaching the £86 million marker, which I will agree is slightly more than a weeks pocket money!

However, I know I am not alone when I say that an arena is EXACTLY what Bristol needs! It would be an understatement if I said that having to travel to Cardiff or London to see any "mainstream" bands like Escape The Fate, Fall Out Boy or any other band. Only naive, money short bands dare perform at the, less than glamorous O2 Academy (formerly Carling Academy). Largely due to the stench of stale beer and the overwhelming scent of sweat, we have been very lucky to see the likes of Angels and Airwaves, Lilly Allen and MGMT perform at the Bristol Academy.

Sadly there seems to be no chance of a venue to be proud of being built within Bristol anytime soon due to the millions that were emptied into the construction and development of Cabot Circus.

Artist's impression of proposed structure

Obviously what Bristol has needed this whole time is two shopping centres and not an arena....obviously!

What Happened to Normal Cartoons?

2009-05-07T12:01:00.000+01:00

Now I'm not as good a conisseur of cartoons as I used to be, but I have several younger brothers and sisters that, when looking after them, I watch the cartoons and stuff with them. As I sit there staring at Dora the Explorer who is teaching kids Spanish before they speak English, I couldn't help thinking, why can't they just watch cartoons? They're kids for fuck sake! Let them just watch a cat chasing a mouse through a house while a rather large, faceless black housewife shouts at "Thomas!" (which now thinking back to it, was quite racist).

Sadly, my brothers have fallen victim to one of the most annoying and draining epidemics on Television, no, not Goldenballs, its the poor standard of programming on the Disney Channel. Good. Lord. Is there no cheesier form of programming in the history of human kind? The Suite Life of Zac and Cody, Camp Rock, Sleepover Club. These children don't deserve this kind of torture. No one does. I enjoyed my childhood viewing. Johnny Bravo, the inappropriate blonde haired "Ladies Man", Ed, Edd and Eddy, three guys who did anything for money and jawbreakers...and the piece de resistance, Wacky Racers!

There were a few cartoons and shows I didn't like as a kid but I just used to watch it because it made me laugh. I don't want to learn all the state capitals and sing along to songs about Brazil, learning, was for school! That was the purpose of school. With the shows of today, kids will be taught from Home by Diego and Mickey Mouse. I just wanted a show about a boy who had a secret laboratory behind his bookcase. Is it too much to ask?

Bring back the good cartoons - Dexter's Laboratory, Wacky Racers, Secret Agent Squirrel, Ed, Edd and Eddy, Top Cat and of course, Hong Kong Phooey, who may I add is the Number One, Super Guy.

Like a Broken Piece of Record, I'll Repeat All of My Plea......

2009-05-06T10:54:00.010+01:00

In need of awesome lyrics, catchy guitar riffs, all of which wrapped up in a bundle of cool? Then look no further than the outstanding 'Racing Kites'!

These guys have graced my iPod for no longer than a few months now and they have shot right up my play count and are now up there with the likes of Angels and Airwaves, You Me At Six and Metallica. To call Racing Kites talented is an understatement of epic proportion!

Their long-standing friendship and self stated passion for music is what fuses this band together to craft a mix of rock, pop and punk. The 5-piece rock band from New Jersey never fail to brighten my day and put a smile across my face!

Their debut album 'We Hold It All Together' was released in 2006 and became an instant classic, with awesome songs such as 'Hands Against The Sky' and 'Restless' I struggle to take the band off repeat. The album also includes ear rocking songs such as 'Is This Love', 'Dreamers And Believers' and 'Your Favourite Last Night Song'.

2008 saw the release of the band's second album, 'Be My Runaway', and it seemed that the guys from New Jersey had created another epic piece of musical craftsmanship. The second album found a way to be even more cool than the first one. Not an easy task! The most outstanding songs being 'All Night Is Alright' and 'My Everything', both of which make it hard for me to even begin to think about listening to anything else. I'd feel like I'm cheating on my beloved Racing Kites!

These guys are the ambassadors of all that is awesome and you'd be a fool not to give your ears a treat and check them out.

Click HERE to experience truly great music!

Talking TV - 02

2009-05-05T22:11:00.004+01:00

...An analytical asskicking,

...A sarcastic suckerpunch,

...An apathetic......whatever...

(right...that's enough.)

I've gotta keep it short this week, recession buget cutbacks... wait, what do you mean next week I'll have to scribe my blog into a slab of stone with a toothpick?

Huh?

This week I'm just gonna share some opinions that I have, they're my opinions...opinions.

GET OFF MY TELEBOX!

Sports commentators - "He's litterally on fire!" - No he's not you idiot. My brain has litterally exploded from listening to sports commentators just babble out a load of non-sense over and over. It's not just football commentators either, rugby, mountain biking and even table tennis too. (I've been doing my homework, scanning through all 999 of Sky's channels looking for the ridiculant) There's got to be an end to the exageration! I propose we make a facebook group called "IF 1M PEOPLE JOIN I WILL SHOOT JOHN MOTSON!". If you have noticed the use of hypocrisy for comic effect in this paragraph, then well done you...*sigh*

Two and a Half Men - Not funny and never will be, the writing makes me want to tear my ears out and the acting is cringe-worthy. At first the show had some potential, maybe, but after a season or two, a womaniser, a loser and a fat kid living together, the jokes just ran dry. To the writers of Two and a Half men: you're spent. Glad that's sorted.

Adverts for car/house/pet/life insurance using charming acoustic songs dripping with folky melodies. I hate you. you make me look forward to your adverts you evil advert boffins! I have not the energy to go find examples on youtube but you know the ones I mean. Lloyds TSB started it with this THIS.

and finally...

Jasper Carrott, you ABSOLUTE CRETIN, get off my telebox!

Just thought I'd leave a little gap to let that settle in... Brilliant. Until next Tuesday evening/Wednesday morning, bye.

Liverpool's Back Four Concern

2009-05-05T19:57:00.003+01:00

Although their name gets thrown in to the Premier League Title Race Raffle every year, they always seem to be the outside option, they're either not consistent enough, have some wretched injuries or just end up having plain bad luck. I am refering to Liverpool of course.

Despite their potent strike force, solid midfield and probably the best captain (and possibly some would argue best player in the Premiership) behind them, they have still never been able to get their hands on the one trophy that all Liverpool fans, players and coaching staff all want: The Title. I think this may be due to the fact that they do not have a solid back four. Granted they do have Jamie Carragher, a player who is as good as his voice is annoying, and Martin Skirtel, a man who looks like he has escaped from a Romanian jail, they don't play together on a regular basis. You could pin this lack of partnership on Rafael Benitez, who enjoys swapping his team around and keeping things fresh but I don't believe it does any good for the defenders as understanding and experience of playing together, game in game out, is the only way for defenders to gel together.

Hopefully after all the boardroom disputes have been settled and everything has become calm behind the scenes at Anfield, Benitez will be able to take a good long look at his team and assess the strengths and weaknesses. I think their midfield is solid, Gerrard can and would play pretty much anywhere on the pitch as long as he gets to wear a Liverpool jersey, Riera and Babel offer width and pace to the team down the wings and Torres can take care of things in the box with Kuyt chipping in with a few goals here and there. I just think Carragher needs a solid partner, maybe Phillip Mexes from AS Roma or Rafael Marquez from Barcelona. Arebola and Aureillio seem to lack the quality needed for a such a big club, meeting the criteria of a squad player but not a first teamer.

Hopefully I haven't been to harsh on the red half of Merseyside. Yes I am a Man Utd fan and yes I do hate them but there's no denying they are a very good team and could beat anyone on their day. I hate them but I respect them.

A Dose of Reality

2009-05-05T19:04:00.003+01:00

Britain's Got Talent, Britain's Got More Talent, X-Factor, American Idol, Big Brother, I'm a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! Where the hell has all the decent TV gone?

When I tune in, I usually stick to the same channels and watch more or less the same type of shows. I mostly watch American sitcoms and Sky Sports, watching Manchester United wining and Liverpool losing, or coming home early at 12.10 and catching Scrubs, which has provided me with many hilarious quotes to exchange with my fellow blogger and good friend, Sam Cook. I'm love laughing and reflect that in my shows, Flight of the Conchords, Family Guy, Only Fools and Horses but NOT King of Queens. However, reality shows have become like a television Starbucks, they're everywhere and taking out the smaller shows as they conquerer our screens.

Britain's Got Talent is a showcase for all the weirdos in Britain to come crawling out of their mother's basements, and either doing some shitty magic act or dressing up as woman and singing "I Will Survive" (Damn Gloria Gaynor). To be honest, I have no idea why grown men would choose Lilly Savage or Edna Everage as a role model. I will hold my hands up and say I watch The X-Factor in the opening stages where all the crap and disillusioned people make asses of themselves, because it's painfully funny. Watching a middle class 18 year old Birmingham single mother with nine kids telling Simon Cowell she'll be the next Mariah Carey just tickles my pickle...

Im a Celebrity Get Me Out of Here! annoys the shiz out of me. Reason One: The title of the show is false advertising by using the word "celebrity". I guarantee you, your mother or father (if you are below 17/18) will say "Oh I remember her! She slept with some guy from Grange Hill" or "Yeah didn't he used to be the ugly guy in East 17?" or something along those lines.

I can handle watching Soaps like Hollyoaks or Eastenders (Phil's an alcoholic. Again!) but mainly because it gives verbal ammunition when chatting to girls. I would enjoy the abolishment of these shows, having them replaced with something - anything. I just think the TV writers have given up and companies have found a way to exploit the idiots of the country whilst people at home phone in and give money to ITV and the like, effectively saying "I wish to see more of these idiots. I would like more idiots of this calibre please, quench my idiot thirst".

My message as TV Messiah is simple: Watch Scrubs, Two and a Half Men and Gillette Soccer Saturday!

Barton: Enough is Enough

2009-05-03T21:51:00.003+01:00

The football week just gone was a positive one for myself as a Manchester United fan, we took another step towards the Premiership Title and gave ourselves an advantage in our Champions League 2nd Leg tie against Arsenal this week. Unfortunately Liverpool also triumphed over Newcastle, sending a much loved Northern team closer to the Coca Cola Championship.

However, although that game for Liverpool fans would have left smiles on their faces regarding the win, I would imagine they would be rather concerned and annoyed at Joey Barton, who maliciously took down Xabi Alonso, who was consequently stretchered off. Many pundits and fans alike praise Barton's ability as a footballer, which I too would agree with, he is a talented football player. However, I believe that he should stop be giving chances by the FA and be banned from football.

Well ok, maybe not banned for life but I think the FA should certainly just stop handing out these temporary bans, slaps on the wrist and feather across the knuckles. Barton has made several contentious tackles and outbursts in the past and has been given the same punishment over and over again. I think the FA need to take much more serious action about calming down this ex-convict and putting him in his place and let him know he can't just brake people's legs left, right and centre!

Even though I am a Man Utd fan and obviously have much higher than average hatred of Liverpool FC, I never like to see a footballer get badly injured. I felt queezy at the sight of Eduaro's leg getting violated and today was another "look-away" moment when Alonso was mauled by Barton. I know some Newcastle fans may come back with "Sam, you can't say Barton should be banned when Roy Keane was a much dirtier player". Well, to them I say, there's a difference. Keane was good. Roy Keane has also never spent time behind bars and provided hours of footballing entertainment.

Joey Barton is nothing but a mere spoilt little boy who, whenever he gets frustrated and his team starts losing, loses his rag and lashes out at footballers with some actual talent and skill. One things for sure: Boys got issues....

Ronaldo: Here Today, Galactico Tomorrow?

2009-04-29T14:40:00.003+01:00

Ask most Manchester United fans and they will probably tell you that they're favourite player is Cristiano Ronaldo. It's inevitable. The 23-year old Midfielder has blossomed into one of the most talented footballers on the planet, along with Lionel Messi, Kaka and Ronaldinho (even though the latter has more or less disappeared off of the footballing radar).

However, no matter how well our No. 7 plays, during the closing months of the season we can already smell the paella and hear the marchas over the horizon as Real Madrid make their periodic transfer market bid for the Portguese Winger. I'm can't speak for all fans but I just can't see Ronaldo sticking around in the drery Salford area when he could be making a bid for the La Liga title in sunny Madrid.

I believe that the temptation of becoming a Galactico will be too much for Ronaldo to resist. Personally, I wouldn't be surprised if he packed up his boots and headed for the Bernabeau, since he has won every trophy possible in England and done everything he can in a Man Utd Shirt. Ferguson has pulled out a diamond in the rough to replace Beckham, and now it is time for Ronaldo to spread his wings. Don't get me wrong, I want Ronaldo to sign a contract for life and become the new George Best (Bar the domestic violence and drinking).

In short, I believe that the Manchester United era of Cristiano Ronaldo's career will be coming to a close in the near future. The bright lights of the Bernabeau will soon be the home to the Portugese Hotstepper and Old Trafford will be a mere memory, with the chants of Ronaldo's name echoing through the tunnels, changing rooms....and the oh so full up Trophy Cabinet.

Talking TV - 01

2009-04-28T20:24:00.015+01:00

...A satyrical sidesweep,
...A pedantic powerpunch,
...A misanthropic mish-mash

(right...that's enough)

So the last few days have showed us that the NEWS GODS* are experts in the trade of scare mongering, and for what it's worth I think they just like saying it...mongering.

BLUNDERBIRDS ARE GO!

This week there was a heafty mishap involving the US presidential plane Air Force One flying over New Jersey and New York City so that some burke in a US military fighter jet could pocket some snaps of the plane looking glamourous and shaking it's money maker around the sights of New York state. No doubt the photos will be used in some AWESOME posters campaign, but the question on everyone's lips is when will Air Force One, or AF1 as she'll later be known, be releasing her own compilation book of saucy flying-mobile pin-ups and subsequent debut single...well maybe it's not on everyone's lips...probably just mine?

The best part about this story is the total over-reaction from the news stations, the BBC went with "Video captures NY jet terror"! dropping the "T" word is a surefire way to scare some ignorant news-fearing folk here across the pond into thinking something serious has actually happened when in reality the majority of us really couldn't care less if some special plane flies over some place in the US, get it off my tele! To be fair to the people featured in the video (availiable on the BBC news website) the idiots who planned this outing decided not to tell anyone their intentions, not even the mayor or New York. Another hilarious over-reaction to a ridiculous event by Britian's news coverage boffins who love broadcasting American news as if it's our own, we know nothing exciting happens that often in the UK, please just cut to the weather so I can plan my day! Rawrgh!

President Barack Obama was reported as being "FURIOUS!"

...oh the evidence is clear.

Until the next time I can find something of worth to shout about, goodbye, possibly Swine Flu, Hollyoaks, Jeremy Kyle or GMTV on the whole, who knows, not me.

*Hugh Edwards anyone? what a guy...

The Mae Shi

2009-04-22T20:35:00.005+01:00

If anyone's in need of a new music fix then look no further than these guys...

The Mae Shi are a four piece experimental punk band hailing from sunny California, whose mix of Indie, Punk and anthemic tunes combine to make one intriguing band, and one only look on their Myspace profile playlist to see why.

Run to Your Grave is that song you heard on the radio a while back but have never been able to find since. With a shouty, upbeat chorus and simple arrangement, it's a definite contender for Song of the Year (so far).

The Lamb and the Lion, which you might recognise as the song from a Skins advert, is also one to listen out for. The Tetris like guitar riff at the start hypnotises, before the very Yeah Yeah Yeahs-esque bridge entices with it's psychedelic charm, making this track very groovy indeed.

If you're into the heavier stuff however, then Vampire Beats is bound to be more your cup of tea. With an altogether more edgy vibe, the short but not so sweet track demonstrates just how intense 90 seconds can be. And if you're really up for chillaxing to something ambient, there's a rather epic extended version of The Lion and the Lamb. At 11 minutes, Kingdom Come is a very mellow synth track that drifts in and out of a slightly surreal James Bond theme.

Tetris? Skins? James Bond?
Told you they were intriguing.

It may only be April but, seeing as the sun's made it's debut appearance in the South this year, I think it's not too early to say that this band will be definite summer BBQ/festival material.

www.myspace.com/themaeshi

Wembley Has No Heart

2009-04-21T11:31:00.005+01:00

After years of anticipation, hope and £798 million pounds, the new Wembley Stadium was built. The new 'Home of Football'. The new Wembley opened in 2007 and you could sense the overwhelming pride this structure had reinstalled into the nation, no longer would the England team have to 'borrow' the Millenium Stadium for their home matches. However, it is missing something. Despite the innovative structural design and the 90,000 capacity, it lacks heart.

The original Wembley truly was 'The Home of Football', it had passion, it had pride. It was a stadium that every young lad dreamed of playing, whether you were English, Chinese, Jamaican. Everyone wanted to tell their grandchildren 'I played at Wembley'. However, for some reason I don't get the feeling that the new Wembley has the same world wide status.

Wembley's problems are of vast quantity. The pitch is of a terrible standard, the prices are massively over priced and the sting of playing at Wembley has been taken out by scheduling the FA Cup semi-finals there for the next 30 years.
Most stadiums are built around the pitch, but Wembley have done it the other way around. It's almost as if they built the stadium and the day before it being unveiled then realised, 'Wait, aren't we supposed to have a pitch in the middle of all these seats?' It is simply not good enough.

The FA have simply built a stadium that could be confused with any other high capacity around Europe and they are trying to squeeze every penny out of the fans who travel all the way to watch a match that is ruined by a pitch that cuts up under-foot and £10 Cheese Burgers.

Easter Break

2009-04-14T16:29:00.002+01:00

We are taking a short break to eat our body weight in chocolate, but we shall soon be back to pump articles into every orifice of your body!

'Shear' nonsense!

2009-04-04T12:10:00.005+01:00

It has finally happened! The 3rd messiah has arrived at Newcastle United, Alan Shearer. This appointment was speculated not too long ago when Kevin Keegan left after his second, unsuccessful, stint at St James' Park and Alan Shearer was tipped as one of the favourites to take the job. In spite of the speculation the 'toon' hero was not hired, instead they appointed ex-Wimbledon manager Joe Kinnear.

However, after requiring heart surgery in February, Joe Kinnear has been forced to step down as manager. This tragic turn of events has resulted in Alan Shearer answering Mike Ashley's distress call and accept the temporary job at Newcastle United.

As a player, Alan Shearer is regarded as one of the Newcastle greats. In 1996 he was bought for a world record fee of £15 million and went on to make 404 appearances, scoring 206 goals. His career with Newcastle was a constant struggle for success, the closest he came to the Premier League title was 2nd place in the 1996-97 season. He also has two FA Cup runners up medals, one in 1998 and the other coming from the 1999 final.

Despite his legendary status at Newcastle United, his appointment comes across as 'wishful thinking' and the hopeful creations of a fairy tale story. His side had a tough first game against Chelsea where they were never expected to gain a result, but i feel that result will become a repeated pattern for Alan's reign as 'gaffer'. He has acquired the services of Ian Dowie who has a record as an unsuccessful manager with a lot of teams and I feel Newcastle will not break this record.

The club are currently sitting in the relegation zone at 18th place and I can only see this position deteriorating with an inexperienced local boy at the helm.

Disclaimer

2009-03-31T13:55:00.003+01:00

It has been brought to our attention that recent articles have been deemed offensive and all of us here at The New Wave would like to apologise.

This is a student blog written and edited by students only; no staff or teachers are responsible for the content published.
The New Wave does not write to offend. If for any reason you are offended by any of our material then we, the student editors, will be happy to handle your complaints.

brendansblog@hotmail.co.uk

The Talent Is Out There ...

2009-03-25T14:58:00.013Z

I don't know about you but I gain no greater satisfaction than when I discover new talent that has never been heard of before. It's like a drug running through my veins and I just can't get enough of it!

Recently, my addiction was was quenched as three groups caught my eye, "groove rock" band 'Ascari', diverse comedy group 'The Plastic Seat Company' and metal band 'Oceans Between Us'. All three packed with raw talent and destined for the big time!

www.myspace.com/plasticseatcompany

I will admit now that I had a slight advantage in discovering The Plastic Seat Company, as one of the members is my older brother. So it would have been hard for me not to have taken notice of them but, by my own choice, I am a huge fan and have followed them from their first ever gig, right through to their successful, nationwide 'Orgasmic Thrust Tour'. However, you may think I have a biased opinion but they are truly ones to look out for in the future. The welsh based comedy group combine parody skits, slapstick performances and individual moments of exuberance to send their audience into a state of heart warming obedience!

www.myspace.com/ascariband

Ascari and Oceans Between Us were also brought to my attention through another close connection and I am already a huge fan of the two bands. Ascari supply a 'feel good factor' to my, heavy metal based, iTunes library and would be best described as the love child spawned from a one night stand between Rock and Funk creating, what they call, "Groove Rock". Their main hit, 'Just Try It Sunshine', has become my soundtrack to 2009 along with some of their other tracks such as, "Not a Care In The World" and "Don't Change".

www.myspace.com/oceansbetweenusuk

Finally we have Oceans Between Us, a band for the true fans of Metal, currently with only one song but what a song! "The Tempest" will have you head-banging and mosh-pitting all night long as it has done for me ever since it made sweet love to my ears just a few weeks ago. I would recommend Oceans Between us to anyone with a vague interest in Rock or Metal as it will blow your mind! I advice those who do not fit into this category to stay clear of the band as they are not for the faint-hearted!

this has to be the coolest site..

2009-03-19T16:00:00.003Z

scanwiches.com

grab a scanner. throw your lunch inside= scanwiches

it'll make you want to scan all kinds of crap..

and raid your fridge.

simultaneously.

the new wave has a new look

2009-03-11T16:40:00.005Z

the blog has had an image overhaul..

this of it as that makeover montage scene from your typical blockbuster

some sweating and pumping at the gym.

the reading of self help books.

quitting smoking.

a new haircut and a new wardrobe.

well, it deserved it.

let us know what you think!

New Music Sucks

2009-03-11T14:47:00.004Z

Is it just me, or does the music that spawns from the mouths and instruments of artists today lack quality? I may be generalising hugely but I think that I do make I good point. Personally, I find the sound of the "Lady Ga Ga" and "The Ting Tings" the equivilant of gerkins in McDonalds burgers - NO ONE LIKES THEM!

For starters, the lyrics are not the most sincere or deepest words I've heard. Songs about underwear, local offlicences or their boyfriends hair is not something I would give valuable seconds of my life to listen to. I could be doing much more useful things like picking up chicks or learning to drive (which would help immensley with my chick picking). These "artists" could write songs about anything if they put their mind to it, but that would mean working hard, practicing and not using the very first thing you think of. That will not happen.

Then we move on to the number one enemy on my music list - Dance music. I find it hard to even consider an ominous beat with one sentence repeated every 30 seconds music. The DJs themselves are considered artists, which I dispise. Some Swedish DJ mixs up some crap in his bedroom and then considers himself a musical genius because he has 10 hits on YouTube. Go have an orgy you blonde bastard.

Then we come to a genre which I don't really like but I wish no harm - Rap. At least the words involved are (or at least used to be) of some degree about the struggle of young black men in the Ghetto. And Eminem. Although now, I find the stylings of 50 Cent and his G-Unit very angry about how they can afford everything and their Bitches and Hos need a lesson in respect. I also find the rap wars between people like Jay-Z, Ja "Jeffery" Rule and T-Pain rather pathetic.

I find Rock/Rock 'n' Roll and Jimi Hendrix the best categories of music since they play their own instruments, sing well and put some passion and feeling into their work and its not just about the money. Sex, Drugs and Rock'n'Roll. Awwwwwwww Yeah.

Exclusive Games - What's The Point?

2009-03-04T12:00:00.003Z

The latest exclusive game for Xbox 360

2005 and 2006 saw the release of two consoles that would change the gaming world for ever! I am, of course, talking about the 7th generation era of consoles, Playstation 3 and Xbox 360. With high definition graphics, advanced AI systems and world wide online functions, these two consoles have changed the face of gaming as we know it. However there is one problem to be resolved, exclusive games.

Both Xbox 360 and PS3 have released several exclusive games, such as Gears of War 1 and 2 for Xbox and Resistance 1, 2 and Killzone 2 for PS3. Now the announcement that the Grand Theft Auto IV spin off game, “Grand Theft Auto IV: The Lost and Damned”, is going to be exclusive to Xbox 360 has made me wonder, what is the point in exclusive games? Considering that Grand Theft Auto IV was an open game, available to PS3 and Xbox 360 consoles, I feel cheated as a PS3 owner that the spin off game is an exclusive one! I know that I am not the only one who feels that this decision is a big slap in the face to all PS3 owners.

I can see that certain companies may want to build up a rapport with a certain section of gamers e.g. Gears of War and Xbox 360, but on the business side of producing games on a mass scale, it only makes sense to sell your game to as many customers as possible, thus making more money. You don’t have to be an expert in business to work that one out!

The whole idea of exclusive games stems from an apparent “war” between PS3 and Xbox owners. Arguments about which one is better and why have given companies the idea to form allegiances with a particular company, Microsoft or Sony. However these arguments are ridiculous, the differences between them are minute. PS3 has higher defined graphics and the ability to play Blu-ray discs but Xbox 360 has a better online system. There shouldn’t be arguments arising because of something as trivial as games consoles.

In closing this article I can only reiterate what I have already said. However, as you can tell, I am not a fan of exclusive games, but I can respect the creators of Gears of War and Resistance as they have brought out exclusive games and stuck with them, unlike Rockstar, who have decided to jump on the band wagon and disregard the millions of people who bought Grand Theft Auto IV on PS3.

Protect your children! That teen is wearing a hoody!

2009-02-27T11:31:00.009Z

I am stood at the bus stop, waiting for the 36 to take me down education lane and in the distance I see a mother walking her child to school. They were laughing and enjoying their time together before the two parted ways for the day, however, all that stopped as they see me stood there with my flat-peak, hoody and lip piercing. The site of me forces the mother to stop laughing and draw a look of concern across her face, for thought of what cynical plans she believes I am devising in my head. As she gets closer she steps the other side of her daughter, putting the mother in the middle of me and the small child, she then pulls the child closer. Fearing that this may be their last moments together. As they pass me, their faces clenched with fear, I pull out my smile, wish them a nice day and get on the bus.

On the bus to college I cant help but feel offended that the mother was so intimidated by my appearances that she felt the need to protect her child. I may not look extremely approachable with my hair covering one eye and my ipod playing Escape The Fate at full volume, but in no way do I appear dangerous or aggressive. I mean what did she really think I was going to do to her and her daughter? Did she expect me to pull out a knife?

Then I begin to notice that she isn't the only one.

On the very same bus journey, an elderly woman stepped onto the bus and choose to stand rather than sit by me! I didn't put my bag on the seat, I was just sat down reading the metro, I looked up and gave her a smile but she still felt too threatened to sit by me. I was left confused to what it was about me that made her feel that she couldn't trust me enough to sit within a 1 meter radius of me!

Then I realised that i shouldn't let it bother me. If someone is intimidated by an item of clothing that has a hood attached to it, then they have to start thinking carefully about there attitudes and prejudice state of mind.

Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe

2009-02-25T14:58:00.006Z

This is not a misprint! Two of the greatest forces ever to be welcomed to our planet are at war via the world of 3rd generation consoles!

2008 was a big year for games, it saw the release of Call Of Duty 5, Pro Evolution 2009, GTA 4 and many more. However, on a personal note it was THE biggest year for gaming! It was a year when i saw the return of some of my childhood heroes, Liu Kang, Raiden, Sub-Zero amongst others made Mortal Kombat the iconic game it was, and when i heard that they were returning to rage war against DC Universe i only had one response......Awesome!!

After i bought this game i rushed home with anticipation that this game could emulate Mortal Kombat games of the past and the minute i opened my door i threw the game into my PS3 without a moment to loose! As the opening credits rolled in front of my eyes i could only dream of what i had in store for me, in a matter of minutes i would be reunited with Scorpion and Sub-Zero as they fight the likes of Superman, Batman and Captain Marvel. Then, suddenly, the main menu loaded up and i was faced with the options of Story Mode, Arkade Mode and Player vs Co.

I don't want to get into every single aspect of my experience playing the game as i would be here all day, so i will cut to the really important info. This game has been updated with new features to add to the Mortal Kombat experience such as 3D fighting modes, enhanced graphics and rare characters like Jax and Deathstroke. The Story Mode is packed with gripping plots and twists and turns that will keep you guessing until the end. The classic Arkade Mode has not changed one bit from the original game and has a certain vintage quality to it.

However, Mortal Kombat vs DC Universe is far from flawless, the Story Mode is filled with far too many cut scenes used to link fights together as the only time you have control is whilst fighting. Its like Metal Gear Solid 4 gone mad! Another problem is how frustrating it is to gain Trophies. After completing the story mode i collected grand total of 1 trophy! After a while you will find yourself banging your head against the floor!

Despite these flaws this is still a brilliant game and any hardcore Mortal Kombat fan will not be disappointed. So remember......FIGHT!

Street Fighter IV - Return of a Classic

2009-02-25T14:42:00.006Z

What's all this? Street Fighter? On a 3rd Generation Console? In 3D?

Yes, your eyes do not deceive you. Ryu, Ken, Guile, Blanka and that speedy bastard Bison are back to kick your joypad all over the place. New characters, new game modes, unique character moves and Xbox LIVE and Playstation Network battles allow you to challenge people all over the world and allow them to get better acquainted with your combos.

I haven't played the game that long, but I am big Street Fighter fan and I loved the previous titles on the old -school consoles like the Super Nintendo and was quite excited when I heard that Street Fighter IV was winging its way to my Xbox 360. Although, I found that no hype was made in any way, shape or form about the revival of the fighting game. Oh well, I have it now.

Good news for all: Capcom have changed no aspects of the gameplay. All the punch, kick, combos and the like haven't been tinkered with, they just feel a lot smoother when performing them. Strangely, I can still remember most of Ryu's combos thanks to hours of button bashing in the past and those skills haven't been wasted thanks to this lack of change. If it ain't broke, don't fix it. Someone should tell that to a certain design developer at Epic Games...

Admittedly, fighting games do seem to be mostly the same which ever one you buy and have probably run their course by now, however, SF IV is a damn good way to prove skeptics wrong. Thanks to the added element of Super and Ultra Combos, you can release some truly damaging moves. And they look pretty cool.

Ultra and Super Combos are unique to each character and are visually stunning. There are many new characters that allow newcomers and veterans alike to start learning new kick ass moves to lay down and taunt their opponents online with. Like Japanese student Sakura, Lucha Libre El Fuerte and martial arts master Gen. All of which make up a pretty diverse bunch.

All in all, this shit is happening!

You, Buy Now!

Beckham still has a lot Moore to give

2009-02-12T09:42:00.004Z

David Beckham's football career has been decorated with success over the years. He has won the Champions League, the Premier League, FA Cup, Copa Del Rey, La Liga, the list goes on. He has played for the biggest teams in the world, Manchester United, Real Madrid and now AC Milan, and last night he achieved something that no one thought was possible. By making his 108^th England appearance he has equaled the great Bobby Moore and is only 17 appearances behind the current record holder, Peter Shilton. However, based on the evidence shown last night, it seems that Beckham's England career is far from over as he still has a lot to offer to an under-achieving side.

Beckham started last night's match on the bench and had to watch on as England went 1-0 down due to a brilliant finish from the Valencia striker David Villa. Spain moved the ball about quickly and dominated possession throughout the whole match and Fabio Capello's side just couldn't cope. Half time brought the moment everyone was waiting for, David Beckham. He came on to replace Downing and a huge cheer went up as he stepped onto the field to reach this famous milestone. Beckham struggled to get into the game at first, rarely getting a touch on the ball and not making an immediate impact. However, it wasn't long until he hit one of his trademark, 60 yard, cross field passes, directly to the feet of Shaun Wright-Phillips, creating a great chance that Wright-Phillips should have done better with.

Beckham showed great determination and the 'never-say-never' attitude he brings into every England game, even when Spain made it 2-0 through an excellently delivered ball into the box by Xavi and a bullet header from Llorente, Beckham was the one getting the lads' morale up and getting them going. He then created the best chance of the game when Carlton Cole's effort was cleared off the line by Marchena after he got on the end of Beckham's perfectly delivered through ball.

It seems that our modern day 'Roy of the Rovers' still has a lot to offer Fabio Capello's England team and if he continues to progress at AC Milan as he has done then there is no reason why Beckham can't beat Peter Shilton's, long standing, record.

Guitar Hero or Guitar Zero

2009-02-11T15:31:00.005Z

Back in the very long summer holiday that we had after doing our GCSEs, I purchased Guitar Hero III: Legends of Rock. I thoroughly enjoyed playing it and eventually became quite good at it, managing to play on Hard and Expert. My friends then joined me in my rock star fantasy and we had good fun rocking out to some classic tracks such as Sweet Child O' Mine, Freebird, Are You Gonna Go My Way, Welcome to the Jungle and Do It Again. However, I find that whenever I mention to anyone who plays an instrument that I have played Guitar Hero, they immediately verbally abuse me and say things like "You can't really do it!", "Stop living a fantasy!" and "You have no idea how hard it really is!". I never said I could play real guitar, although I have bought one and I am learning so ha.

This is a very short article, but leave a comment or two and let me know how you guys feel. Guitar Hero is there for fun, not so people can say "Yeah I play Guitar................Hero".

Liverpool - A Ticking Time Bomb

2009-02-11T14:36:00.010Z

The moment it all fell apart

Liverpool Football Club, one of the most famous teams in the world and currently still the most successful team in English history. Premier League champions 09-10? They wish....

Before reading this article, you must know that I am a Manchester United fan and have been so since 1995, so I obviously have some bias views on this topic but I will try to keep my words as in perspective as possible.

Every year in the Premiership, the usual winners names are tossed around, Man U, Chelsea, Arsenal and Liverpool as an outside chance. Although it has been proven many times that Liverpool are a powerful team to be reckoned with, I personally just can't ever see them grasping the title and spraying champagne everywhere, while Rafael Benitez sits calmly on the bench showing no emotion as usual. Even Arsenal are now a fading light of a team, with their young talent unable to get leadership and sometimes losing their heads on the pitch causing them to fall behind in the title race. Granted Liverpool are currently second in the table with only two points behind Manchester United, I think everyone is just waiting for the clock to hit 12 on their Cinderella season.

I can easily see them lifting many of the other silverware on offer to them, such as the Champions League or FA Cup and at the same time giving us neutrals incredibly close and tense matches to watch as they score with -10 minutes to go. However, I think Rafa, the players and the fans want to win the league, seeing as it is the last trophy they have yet to win since the Premier League's formation back in 1992.

I also probably wouldn't have written this article had Robbie Keane not spoken out in earlier in the month about telling Benitez to "Stick" his medal. He doesn't even have a medal to stick you Irish failure! Then the beanpole bad boy Peter Crouch sticks his oar in and agrees with Keane. Crouch doesn't deserve Meals on Wheels!

All in all, I don't think Liverpool will win the league, at least not with their current manager who unnecessarily changes the team for no reason and lack of depth they have within the squad. Gerrard gets injured and Lukas replaces him. Not very reassuring is it? Feel free to comment and tell me how right or wrong I am.

Aston Villa Are a Breath of Fresh Air

2009-01-29T12:00:00.005Z

For years now, the Premier League’s top four positions have been dominated by the same teams every year. Manchester United, Arsenal, Chelsea and Liverpool have been setting the standard for the rest of the league for what seems an age and no-one has even come close to knocking them off of their pedestal. However, it seems that there is a ‘David’ to stand toe-to-toe with the ‘Goliaths’ of the Premiership, that team is Aston Villa.

When Martin O’Neill was appointed Aston Villa manager, back in 2006, he said ‘Trying to restore it to its days of former glory seems a long way away - but why not try?’, and it seems that they have done a lot more than just try. With English youngsters such as Ashley Young, Gabriel Agbonlahor and James Milner all playing key roles in the team, he has brought Aston Villa into the eyes of the public again by breaking into the, elusive, top four.

Aston Villa are currently sitting in 3rd place with 47 points from their 23 games and they are undefeated in their last 8 games. In spite of their fantastic league form this season, the Villa boss still feels that his youngsters have much to learn if they are to break into the top four and claim a place in Europe.

If Aston Villa manage to uphold their strong league form then they look odds on to finish in the top four, but who will miss out? Well, I’m sorry to say, but Arsenal look the weakest out of the four, they are not scoring enough goals and they are lacking a real leader in defence. If any one is to loose out then it can only be Arsenal to have to make do with a 5th place finish.

This attack on the top four by Aston Villa can only mean good news for the Premiership as it may inspire other lower teams to press forward and challenge the top guns for their throne as “the top four”.

The Cheating World

2009-01-28T10:48:00.004Z

Finally, the misery comes to an end. You come out of college; it’s been a very hard day, English coursework, ICT coursework and an extra ton of homework in you bag, just waiting to suck up hours of attention tonight. It’s raining; you are saturated to the skin, and now the waters seeping into your bag. The cleverly mapped out ink on the first page of your English coursework is now dripping, like oil from a car, into the bottom of the unknown. Your feet feel frozen solid, numb, and your head feels heavy, as you struggle to keep it up. You finally near the point of where painful walking needn’t happen any more. Suddenly, it strikes; like a 20 ton train hitting you. Your heart sinks, making you feel empty, worthless and alone. Your lungs contract, it’s hard to breathe, and loss of all energy makes you feel unstable. The tears build up, but won’t expose their selves to the coldness of what has just happened. As the sweat streams from your forehead, you focus on the only thing left in front of you. The lock that needs no key.

Being a victim of crime twice now, just in the last month, has made me come to the disappointing realisation that we can’t have anything nice nowadays, without others wanting it, and in soul destroying situations, getting it. Even more soul destroying than this, is that fact that everybody reading this knows exactly what I am talking about. Whether they know it as stealing, thieving, nicking, jacking, mugging or bag snatching, everybody, either being a victim themselves, or knowing someone else who is has to live in the unsafe world of today. Isn’t it sad that we live in a world like this, insecure, not being able to have what we want.

"We are being made the mugs"

My experience has been a garage broken into and a bike stolen, only minor crime to some, yet a major obstacle to me, and they don’t stop there. 392 people got mugged in 2007 alone, 135 of those poor victims were re-mugged again. It’s not little old grannies anymore; they still carry around phones with a credit card sized sim. No, it is us; we are the prey to the scavenging vultures. Are they that desperate? Do they really need our goods that much? Most of our stolen items, through mugging, theft and burglary are used to fund drug abuse. The scale is so big, that the UK pays out £15 billion a year in health and crime bills. They don’t necessarily take our stuff because they want it, but because they need it. They are the ones getting pleasure, whilst we are being made the mugs, picking up the tab.

Theft and crime has been going on for centuries, back in the days where farmers would steal each other’s crops, to inventors taking each other’s ideas. The world runs in an unfair manner. There are the workers, the people who get jobs, earn money and buy things. Then there are the rest, who are jealous of them, and want to take it away from them, who are the thieves and criminals. You could say, there are the honest, and the unworthy.

Crime is an unbeatable villain who just keeps attacking, and finding new ways to break the chains of law. Security doesn’t exist anymore, there is no such thing as secure. We cannot be secure in this world of a food chain, and unfortunately, we are at the bottom. Teenage crime is bigger than most, and around half of teenagers aged from 11 to 16 are victims of crime each year. This is one of the most shocking facts of our country, and applies all around the world. We are the easy prey, and we are getting bullied.

We all have to face it. The world is a cheat. But, the main question is who to blame? We, the hard working, poor, wounded honest citizens? Or them, the low life, drug taking villains? Of course there’s always hindsight, but we shouldn’t blame ourselves. If the world was rid of criminals and thieves, the problem would not exist. If they only put a bit of effort into life, get an honest job they can become one of us, instead of a parasite, depending on us. We would be able to sleep more soundly at night, knowing tomorrow will be another hassle free day to be free, fearless and forget our troubles. Fear is the control factor here, they want us to live in it constantly and to be frank, I’ve had enough of it.

One Step Forward, Six Months Back!

2009-01-27T12:03:00.005Z

Harry Redknapp has been in charge of Tottenham for just over three months now and things started off well for the ex-Portsmouth manager. He took them out of the relegation zone within two weeks, picking up wins against the likes of Liverpool and Manchester City and even managing a draw with North London rivals Arsenal. However, it seems now that the honeymoon period is over and things don’t seem all that perfect at White Hart Lane.

With no wins coming from their last four games Harry had to bring in some fresh faces to strengthen his Spurs side and that’s exactly what he has done. He brought in ex-Tottenham man Jermain Defoe from Portsmouth, paying £7 million more than he paid for him a year earlier at Pompy. This was seen as positive move as Jermain is a proven goal scorer and he was reluctant to leave Spurs in the first place. However, it seems that Harry is taking it too far with his latest signing, another former Tottenham player, Pascal Chimbonda.

The French international left Tottenham and joined Sunderland in July 2008 and now he has returned, six months later, to have another go around with Spurs. Chimbonda originally left due to a fall out with, former manager, Juande Ramos, as he was seen as a negative influence in the changing room. In spite of this Harry as seen fit to re-sign Pascal to build up his, short numbered, squad. This transfer has not been well perceived as Chimbonda was deemed a negative influence six months ago, and now he is walking into an, already, ‘shaky’ changing room.

The Tottenham manager has also expressed an interest in signing Tottenham’s ‘old faithful’, Robbie Keane. It’s only been six months since the Republic of Ireland striker left White Hart Lane and it seems that he is unhappy with life in Merseyside. Harry was reported to have said “I wouldn't sit here and say I wouldn't like to have Robbie Keane at my football club, I'd be a liar”; although he has explained that a deal would be unlikely.

It seems that Harry is stuck in reverse and needs to start looking into the future of Tottenham Hotspur, if not then it wont be long until Glen Hoddle finds himself wearing a Spurs shirt again.

To Lose My Life

2009-01-21T14:45:00.003Z

In case you've been living in a cave for the past couple of weeks, you'll no doubt have heard that White Lies have been tipped as one of the bands set to cause a storm in the Indie circuit. Following on from the Goth chic of Glasvegas, White Lies are the latest band to get miserable. And it sounds great.

Take equal measures of Interpol and Editors, mix in the morose baritone of Robert Smith and add an album full of desolate lyrics about love, loss and death and you've got White Lies' debut, To Lose My Life. As well as producing uneasy tracks with a sense of foreboding equal to that of pressing play on a Britney Spears album, there's also a few riffs in there that are Radio 1 Playlist worthy; E.S.T's rocking chorus and the Franz Ferdinand-esque Farewell to the Fairground to name but a few. At times it seems that the band are trying a little too hard to vie for our attention and I have to admit, a couple of tracks, (Death and Unfinished Business) left me somewhat bored. The title track, whilst failing in the mainstream charts entering at only #35, is the least gloom ridden of the lot of them and is impossibly catchy, definitely one to download if you haven't already.

All in all, they may be one of the finest bands to emerge this year so far, but they have a bit of work to do before they surpass The Cure.
7/10
To Lose My Life is out now.
www.myspace.com/whitelies

Strauss Has It All To Do

2009-01-13T13:19:00.004Z

After days of speculation Peter Moores has been sacked as England coach, Kevin Pieterson has resigned as England captain and Andrew Strauss has already been named as KP's successor. All of this because of a disagreement over Micheal Vaughan's, correct, exclusion from the test squad to tour West Indies next month. With all of this "chaos" over the past week, it leaves Andrew Strauss with a tough job of reuniting a divided changing before the West Indies tour and, most importantly, the Ashes series next summer.

I do not doubt the new skipper's ability to piece together the puzzle that is the England camp but he needs the backing of his senior members. Players such as Andrew Flintoff, Steve Harmison and Paul Collingwood need to get behind Strauss and give him the backing he needs and deserves. This situation will have a big impact on some of the younger, less experienced players and the seniors need to show strong character to put this ugly mess behind them and start planning for the Ashes.

Believe it or not but this situation could have a positive affect on the team in the long run. Star players have rarely made great captains for England and I do not believe that Pieterson would have been an exception. England need to get the best out of KP and for them to do that he needs to be focused on his own game.

Ian Botham's form dropped, dramatically, when he was made captain of the England side in the 1980s and his reign as captain didn't last for long as a result of this poor form. It wasn't until he was relieved of his duty that he started to score runs galore.
As long as KP still wants to play then we have nothing to worry about on that front.

However, I would like to bring attention to selection. I would like to think that the new skipper would want to put his own stamp on the team and the players playing. Promising young batsmen such as Owais Shah and Ravi Bopara have been waiting for a chance to cement a permanent place in the team and after their impressive displays in the ODI series against India, I believe they deserve a run out.

Another selection issue is the current, "lack-lustre", bowling attack, consisting of Steve Harmison, Monty Panesar, James Anderson, Andrew Flintoff and Stuart Broad. The only member of that line up that has earned an unchallenged place in the team is "Freddie" Flintoff, other than that, they are all walking on a tight rope.

Steve Harmison is hit and miss but you accept that as his "hit" moments can change a game completely but Monty, "Jimmy" Anderson and Staurt Broad all performed below par in the India test series and they should be lucky to keep their places in the team.

These are exciting times for English Cricket, with the Ashes series looming, England need to show unity in the West Indies and start building towards the summer to retain the Ashes.

Hello 2009

2009-01-12T13:57:00.005Z

The New Wave is currently warming up t0 begin a shiny new year of bringing you as much witty banter, wave reviews and journo-cynic satisfaction as you can handle, so bear with us. In the meantime, we trust you all had fun saying goodbye, farewell, auf wiedersehn 2008, and welcomed the new year with open arms and positive thoughts and, (in my case) enough booze to knock out an elephant. We also hope that the festive season has left you as frostbitten, bloated and penniless as most of us are feeling right now... Peace.

Seasons greetings

2008-12-22T14:47:00.004Z

All of us here at The New Wave would like to wish you all a Merry Christmas and an alcohol filled New Year!

The Mandatory 2008 Post Continued

2008-12-15T17:40:00.007Z

I know, the suspense must be killing you, just who will obtain that oh so glorious accolade of my favourite album of the year?

5.The Last Shadow Puppets-The Age of the Understatement
It was obvious from the moment the new side project of Alex Turner's came into public awareness that it was going to be a hit. He seems to have the midas touch, what with the Arctics going from strength to strength; the band picked up 2 Brit awards in February of this year, one of which for their album Favourite Worst Nightmare. And then there's this bloke called Miles from some Northern Indie band. The music industry seemed to hold a collective breath when news of an album was uncovered: would this be as good as some of what the Arctic Monkeys did? Did this mean that they were splitting up? And who the hell is this guy called Miles? Whilst we still don't really know the answer to the latter (ok so he's the guy from The Rascals, but does anybody care?) we do now know that whilst venturing into a thoroughly different terrain, it seems the boys still know how to make just as exciting an album. If you're a fan of the vintage James Bond films then you'll love the lush orchestral backing, and for those who actually enjoy a song with meaning (I mean really, are we human or are we dancer? Please) there's plenty of Alex's ever-so-clever wit to keep you entertained for the duration of the record. If you like this, then also check out some of Scott Walker's stuff, it runs along a similar vein and is where the inspiration for this LP.

4. The Ting Tings- We Started Nothing
I think we can safely say everybody on the face of the little dot that is our world is aware of this pop duo. No doubt you've seen the iPod ads, hummed along to it on the radio and probably seen them being interviewed countless times on the tellybox. So, I hear you ask, why the hell do you have them here when they've become largely annoying? Well, for one this album is the perfect example of how music should be played. Tracks like We Started Nothing have a definite groove to them, you feel as if you're a fly on the wall of Katie and Jules' garage having a jamming session. Others, like Fruit Machine and Great DJ are cheeky slices of pop, completely inoffensive and, more importantly, infectious. I challenge you to hear this album in its entirety without once smiling or bobbing your head. I can testify that this is, infact, impossible. Yes they've been a constant presence in 2008, but for damn good reason; Jules and Katie really love the music, you can tell from the this record and, when listening to them, it's hard not to agree with them.

3.Lightspeed Champion-Falling Off the Lavender Bridge
So, your band Test Icicles has just fallen apart and you're left with nothing to do, what now? Well, you create a whole new alter ego and create an album full of truly magical folk. Duh. I could only compare this album to After Eights: Rich and indulgent, yet at the same time bitter, and as much as you try you can't eat just one. A similar experience is listening to Falling Off the Lavender Bridge. Dev utilises the mass of instruments he has at his disposal, from flutes to fiddles, and features the fantabulous Emmy the Great on a number of tracks. All of these combine to make a warm and welcoming sound, traditional of Western folk, but still retaining a hint of darkness. I don't know what Dev had to go through to think of lyrics like "Guzzle down, my neck will burn as we kiss and I'm sick in your mouth" and frankly, neither do I want to, but still, there's a sense of acidity and purpose. Equally interesting is song Midnight Surprise. Although at first glance the 10 minute song seems daunting and ostentatious, you soon forget it's one song but rather 3, the movements seem to interweave effortlessly and upon its ending you still find yourself yearning. This deserves to be placed higher on my list than #3, and would have been if it weren't for those pesky Americans..

2.MGMT-Oracular Spectacular Alright, hands up if this is a shock. I thought so. Funnily enough this little known band (I jest of course) have made quite a stir both sides of the Atlantic. I vaguely remember reading an article in the NME near the beginning of this year, something about bands to watch out for in 2008, and these guys were featured quite highly. Described as fresh and psychedelic, a kind of new Flaming Lips for all the indie kids to drool over, if you will. It wasn't until I'd heard their now infamous Time to Pretend featured on the last episode of Series 2 of Skins that I actually had any inclination to agree. Then, after much googling and downloading of their album, I regretlessly joined the growing cohort of MGMT fans. My only sulk about this band was that they played two sets at Glastonbury at awkward slots, in between nap time and wandering around the Green fields. Damn them. Anyway, this album is the perfect soundtrack to lazing about in a field somewhere, prancing about the flowerbeds and hugging trees. Or what the 70's would have been like if it were ever so slightly more edgy. This album contains more than a few hooks, prompting many a shout-a-long at their gigs and the skill of the guitarist is incredible. Some bands like to coyly shuffle onto the scene with a little ditty about some girl that left them. Not these guys though. They exploded onto the indie/rock airwaves with an astonishingly magnificent first album. Let's hope they don't fall in the trap that is the second album curse.

1. Vampire Weekend-Vampire Weekend
And so we reach the climax of my top ten album rundown with the lovely Vampire Weekend. The main reason this band's album is my favourite of the year is because it contains the blueprint for success in the indie industry, both in terms of appearance and music. This group of preppie types certainly know how to dress well whilst also in keeping with the afro-influenced style of their music. Now I'm not a huge fan of African music, purely because although it sounds ok there's nothing that catches me, it just sort of ambles along. Vampire Weekend's afro-indie however does anything but. The influence of Afro syncopation adds a rather exciting pace to the track, thoroughly different from the boring 4/4 rock we've been enduring for some time. Plus the harmonised vocals on this are truly a delight, particularly on tracks like Oxford Comma. Each song also has a distinctive vibe to it that sets it apart from the next, from the hyper bouncing A-Punk to the lazy Sunday afternoon The Kids Don't Stand a Chance, every track is treated as a potential single rather than a bunch of tracks thrown together carelessly. As well as using African influences, the group have also included a seemingly odd orchestral backing that, surprisingly, actually works quite well. Although some may deem this band too preppy for their liking, I adore this record as it is truly one of the most original things to have come out of this decade so far, not just the year, makes a lovely change from the mockney masses, don't you think?

So that was my very long album chart, but here's some more albums you may want to try:

Glasvegas-Glasvegas- Miserable music at its best.
The Cure-4.13 Dream- It's like they've never been away-hurrah!
Fleet Foxes- Fleet Foxes- Another interesting take on the typical American rock album.
Sigur Ros- With a Buzz in Our Ears we Play Endlessly- Truly awe inspiring ambiance from the band with the unpronounceable song titles.

What have been your favourites of the year?

"I pledge allegiance, to the shoe......"

2008-12-15T13:11:00.015Z

Or shoes, even, that were hurled at George 'I know the human being and fish can coexist peacefully' Bush, one after the other, by iraqi cameraman Muntadar al-Zaidi during a conference in Baghdad on Sunday.....

At the time of the incident;
(a rather flustered)Bush: "it's a sign of free society"
Zaidi: "it is the farewell kiss, you dog".

When probed by the press, the soon-to-be ex-president's response was hilariously ever reflective of his infamously integral intelligence and humour; "All I can report is a size 10".
HA.

Piercings: Or how I stopped worrying and learned to love the holes in my face

2008-12-13T12:39:00.003Z

my dream..

My sister got a piercing when I was 10, she had got her ear cartilage pierced and made me promise not to tell our mum. When my Mum did eventually found out, she didn’t get angry, she actually wanted to get the same piercing herself and this kind of ruined it for my 15 year old sister. Through out the next couple of years she would get lots of things pierced and my mum would only look at her go ‘Oh dear’ but never seemed to care. My sister was like the black sheep of the family and now and again my grandmother told her that no boy would ever marry her if she looked like that.

It seemed that piercing was something my sister would always be interested in, she’s taken a lot of them out but still has her facial piercing. I was watching her change, and seeing how she became more confident because she had indulged in something she thought looked good. Even though some of her friends hated them, she didn’t seem to care, she said that it was her choice and it didn’t matter. I mean it’s only a bit of metal. So when I was 12 I decided that I was going to get piercing’s and tattoo’s because I thought they looked cool. Now I have only uttered the immortal words of ‘I think they look cool’ but why is that not a valid reason? Do I have to have a spiritual reason to shove a needle through my face, it’s just cool man, you don’t understand okay.

For somebody who is considering getting a piercing that will be on display you will have to have the same love/hate relationship with it that most people have. I have been shouted at in the streets, family and friends say I’m ruining my looks and it’s unlikely you’re going to get a job as easily if you could if you didn’t have piercings. If you’re someone who won’t stand by your principles, save your £20 and the pain and don’t get it done. I have considered taking my piercings out, but I love them, I don’t think I could take them out without feeling like me. Piercing falls under the umbrella of ‘body modification’ which literally means changing your body, this includes fake nails, hair extensions, hair dying, make up, wearing a corset and tanning. I bet most guys wouldn’t be able to leave the house without gel in their hair, like most girls wouldn’t face the world without their make up.

Now I’m nearly 18, I’ve realised that I don’t need to conform to what people want to actually survive in the world. I can go work in bar, a music shop or be one of those awful charity workers on the street and proudly wear my piercings. If I get more done I know that even my sister would have her doubts that it looked good; after all, there’s a lot of piercing hierarchy. Ideally I’d like to get another lip and nose piercings, an industrial bunch of cartilage piercings, cheek piercings, my tongue and some naughty places too. If you see me in 10 years and I’m not covered in tattoos and have all those piercings it means that I lost my principles and I’m working in Tesco.

Teenage Angst

2008-12-12T23:22:00.006Z

So tonight my friends and I thought it would be nice if we actually went out somewhere instead of locking ourselves in our bedrooms watching the IT Crowd followed by some obscure comedian's warblings all night. So, after many a google search (not really, it was advertised well enough) I found that local folkman Barry Dolan, aka Oxygen Thief was celebrating his 100th gig by playing with a couple of other singer-songwriters at a local pub in Stokes Croft. Lovely. Now usually the people in Stokes Croft are lovely to us young 'uns, well by that I mean we can get into The Croft without hassle, even though we are sixteen, hardly toddlers. However, tonight's escapades have proved to be the exception..

So after having a stressful week of exam revision and coldness we thought a civilised night of folk wouldn't go a-miss. So, after eventually getting there and getting in easily enough, we settled down to watch the first of the acts play, in a state of blissful unawareness of what was about to unfold.

Before I continue I must stress, we're not exactly innocent (there was some hunting for alcohol involved, alas to no avail) but still we had absolutely NO intention of even trying to purchase alcohol in the pub in which we were, I mean that's just poor logic isn't it? Plus we were there, well I was anyway, to see Oxygen Thief play again.

After seeing him support Chris T-T in the pub down the road from The Junction, I definitely jumped at the chance to hear him play live again. Oxygen Thief makes music both interesting and refreshing; almost like when you dip your face in water and, although it stings a bit, wakes you up. Hmm, maybe a poor analogy, but needless to say I like his music. He has a distinct personality that definitely comes across in his songs, and has a genuine enthusiasm for the music that he plays, a trait that is seldom seen these days. So, understandably, I was looking forward to hearing his set and having a quiet night with some friends before the hussle and bustle that is the festive period. However, just after the first act had left the tiny stage (sort of like what Snow Patrol would sound like if they needed a bit of prozac) a barmaid kindly asked us to leave the premises, as another pub had been raided for underage drinkers. Underage DRINKERS.
Why is it that just because we're teenagers in a pub that we would be classed as underage drinkers?

Now normally I wouldn't mind so much, but when it comes to music I have no sense of humour. Why should we be discriminated against due to our age? Why should our junior years restrict us from enjoying good music? I could even understand if there were age restrictions of gigs with explicit content, like, say a German Death Metal troupe (why German? I don't know, but they sound more grr) But really, it's folk.

Folk I tell you.

And this isn't the first time this has been an issue.
You only need to go to the local ticket shop to see that us under 18's have been ostracised in terms of gigs. The list of clubs and bars we can't go to is endless; Louisiana? Nope. Fleece? Uh Uh. Thekla? Don't even bother. Everywhere you go bouncers are quick to push you out the door just because you don't have a valid id or are a few months younger than the rest of the punters. Age doesn't make you more mature. Neither does it mean you should all of a sudden be let into the magical world of good music on your eighteenth birthday. We all deserve the right to enjoy ourselves in a safe environment where we can see genuine talent. Yes there's the Academy, but unless you're fliering it don't come cheap for a night out. And we're only poor students afterall.

Look at the huge response Underage Festival got this year, it's clear to see that teenagers are sick of being alienated from the music we enjoy. So to any venue managers out there, the next time a group of sober, money paying teenagers enter your venue looking to support local talent such as Oxygen Thief, give the kids a chance. Innit.

http://www.myspace.com/oxygenthief

Ashes 2009 - What are our chances?

2008-12-11T14:00:00.000Z

Finally, it’s nearly here! After years of anticipation and hope, the Ashes are returning to England, but what chance does this under performing England side have against a new look Australia? With Kevin Pieterson leading from the front for England and no Glen McGrath, Shane Warne, Adam Gilchrist or Justin Langer for Australia I think England have a decent chance of banishing those demons who have been haunting them since the 5-0 white wash in the 2006 Ashes in Australia.

Now it’s not as easy as I am making it out to be. Australia may be without some of their star men, but they still have Ricky Ponting, the best number 3 batsman and captain in the world, Simon Katich who is scoring runs for fun at the moment, Matthew Hayden, one of Australia’s better players in 2005 and Brett Lee, one of the fastest bowlers in the world. So it’s by far a weak Australian team. However, they are yet to replace Shane Warne with a leg spinner of a respectable standard, they have failed to bring in someone that has the same effect on the game as Adam Gilchrist and no one will ever be able to replace the legendary Glen McGrath. Australia are not the dominant force they were in 2005 or ’06, they are an old side, who base their still of play on experience rather than the pure aggression we saw in ’05 and ’06.

England, on the other hand, have got a healthy mix of experience, aggression and athleticism, with Kevin Pieterson possessing all three attributes. Peter Moores (England coach) has brought back the once great Steve Harmison, who was one of the stars in ’05; he has been patient in bringing back Andrew ‘Freddie’ Flintoff from his recurring ankle injury and there are talks that he may be bringing back the master of reverse swing, Simon Jones, who is most remembered for ripping Ricky Ponting’s off-stump out of the ground in the ’05 Ashes series. However, it is not just older, more experienced players that Peter Moores has worked into this England team. He has also brought in youthful players such as Ravi Bopara, Owais Shah, Samit Patel and Stuart Broad. All of which he has picked out of the county leagues where Peter Moores made his name as coach of Sussex.

Despite what I have said, England do have there problems building up to the next Ashes series. The England wicket-keeper position is still vacant of a solid applicant, all the wicket-keepers in the pipe line have their flaws, Ambrose isn’t good enough at batting, Prior makes a lot of mistakes, the list goes on. Whilst I am on the point of selection, I don’t see the logic behind picking Stuart Broad above several other worthy replacements, he is only in the team because he can bat at number 8, that’s it! He is supposed to be a bowler and his main priority should be to take wickets, but he doesn’t even do that. He doesn’t have the pace to trouble the likes of Ricky Ponting and he doesn’t have the experience and intelligence to vary his line, length and pace like the great Glen McGrath used to do. I am not saying that you have to be as good as Glen McGrath to get into the England team but at least show potential as a top wicket taker. Stuart Broad still fails to step up to the big stage of test cricket and I don’t understand his constant selection into this team.

As you can see both sides have there strengths and weaknesses leading up to this Ashes series and it is hard to predict the outcome of the series as Cricket is an unpredictable sport in its self. However, there is one thing separating these two teams and I think it will be the difference in 2009, that difference is Kevin Pieterson. This South African born, big hitting number 3 possesses the aggression needed to battle the Australians and with him leading the charge in 2009, I think that is what will give England there edge in the summer. He was our main man in ’05 and he’ll be our main man again in ‘09.

I am predicting a 2-1 victory for England in the much anticipated 2009 Ashes, with Kevin Pieterson proving that he is the best in the world.

Film review: Waltz with Bashir

2008-12-10T16:29:00.016Z

Film review: Waltz with Bashir

Lacking what was probably ample knowledge of a context which pretty much scaffolds this film, (but still drawn by curiosity of what looked like impressive animation), I was a bit apprehensive as to what I'd make of Waltz with Bashir, but, for anyone else unfamiliar with the Lebanese war of 1982; don't be hesitant, it's not as big an impairment as you think...

Directed and written by Ari Folman, whose own memories, or perhaps lack of memories, are what sculpts the films narrative, Waltz with Bashir depicts a riddled soldier, Ari (voiced by the director himself) who, after a nostalgic conversation with an old friend who confides in him about his recurring nightmares in which he is chased by a pack of 26 vicious dogs, believing that it has some connection to his memoirs of an Israeli Army mission he took part in during the war and having long forgotten himself what surrealy seems like a bad dream, attempts to recollect the hazy fragments of his time spent in Palestine during the war. From here-on in the film is a quirky, jigsaw - like sequence of borrowed memories and accounts of others, collected through a series of rendezvous’ with his fellow comrades, that Ari is hoping will help resurface his own. These accounts are real, the only fictitious aspect being the fantastically similar animation of the men who give them.

It's not just the enthrallingl and surreal recollections the interviews with Ari’s associates unfold that leave us transfixed; the incredible graphics alone make Waltz with Bashir undeniably elite amongst all comparative docu-films. Razor sharp illustrations brilliantly personificate everything on screen, and, be it the impeccibly defined physical characteristics of Ari and his comrades, or the surfaces of water or landscapes that crawl in motion, there isn't an animated stone left unturned.

Inconceivably, the subtitled but contextually humorous dialogue only further superiorizes what is already a visually and historically poignant portrait. However, I think that the icing on this cake is the concluding couple of minutes, during which a transition is made and Folman, using archive video footage of the trails of wreckage left in Lebanon post-war, brings his animated masterpiece to life in grim and quite disturbing reality.

The Mandatory 2008 Post

2008-12-10T15:15:00.000Z

So, it's that time of year again when everybody gets a little gushy and retrospective about the year that has passed, and what a year it's been. The Recession, Obama's monumental victory and umm, well, Mugabe has meant that you couldn't call this year dull. Besides all the tedium of the political world, there's been some great stuff about in the musical side of things. Folk has seen a surprising comeback and it seems people are finally growing tired of the Libertine sound-a-like sea of indie bands out there, choosing a more unconventional style instead.

I thought I'd add to the endless list of bloggers doing this and compile my very own list of 2008. However, due to my ramblings it will follow over a couple of posts. enjoy!

10. Ladyhawke-Ladyhawke

In case you haven't yet noticed, 2008 has been the year of the synth. It's been unavoidable as of late, so much so that I wanted to get one and break it into teeny tiny pieces. However, Ladyhawke's self-titled debut is definitely the exception to the rule. This is an album full of potential singles, not a filler in sight. For someone who describes herself as being an introvert, you certainly can't tell listening to this. Pip's vocals ooze confidence and her songs have the perfect blend of synth and guitar that combine to make a damn catchy album. I'm already looking forward to her follow up, get to it Pip!

9. Robots in Disguise-We're in the Music Biz

Ok, so I know this album wasn't exactly ground breaking stuff, but this was the record that made me fall in love with this edgy electro duo. My friends and I saw Sue Denim and Dee Plume play songs from this album the night before its release, and they were as adrenaline fuelled and chaotic as they are on the album. This record proves that not only can the girls make tracks fit for dancing like no-one's watching but they also have a good sense of humour; giving us a more realistic view of the rock'n'roll lifestyle in Can't Stop Getting Wasted and unleashing a tongue in cheek tirade against conformity in Don't Copy Me. This is a much rougher album than their previous in terms of style, but it's the edginess that makes this well worth a listen.

8. Frank Turner-Love Ire & Song

2008 has really been Frank's year. He's spent much of the year touring bloody everywhere and yet still had time to release a refreshing and witty album. What a nice bloke. Mr. Turner is one of my favourite finds of the year. Frank writes music that not only makes you think but allows you to actually enjoy his clever lyrics. Charity single 'Long Live the Queen' is a testament to this, as on first listen it's a catchy song but if you dig deeper and listen to the lyrics, you hear the story of a young women dying in hospital from breast cancer, the charity in which the single's revenue goes towards. This is the most underground artist on my list, and I really hope that by this time next year I will be able to gloat that I introduced this chap to you when he's one of the UK's most successful debut singer-songwriters.

7.Ladytron-Velocifero
For me personally, 2008 has seen my musical tastes expand into the unfamiliar field of electro. Having grown up with the likes of Placebo, New Order and Echo and the Bunnymen shoved down my throat, I thought it would be nice to see what all of the fuss was about regarding this strange mesh of electronic sounds. Listening to this album is almost like being hypnotised and punched in the face simultaneously. The edgy beats and angst ridden synths create a definite groove that makes it all the more addictive to hear. Although some of the songs on here do make this album lose a touch of its charm, (Predict the Day's jaunty rhythm is more nauseating than exciting) others simply thrill me (see Versus' dangerously catchy refrain and bizarre kitten lyrics), making this album a definite one for the weekend.

6. Laura Marling
Now at this point I'm going to say that I don't intend to market this album rundown as the most unconventional thing to do at the end of the year, lets face it Joe and Jane Bloggs have and are going to write posts along the same vein as this here thing. I can bet you 3 packets of Jellytots that this young lady will feature heavily. Laura Marling is the brilliantly talented songstress who's managed to take the alternative music scene by storm and is a staple of 6Music's playlist. Aaaand she's only 18, lest we forget. This album is a true testament to her talent, with her warm raspy vocals leaving you wanting more and her brilliantly dark yet witty lyrics. It's been said before but it's hard to believe from hearing this album that she is only just an adult, a mature and rather graceful air seems to resonate from this record. How this girl did not get the Mercury Prize is beyond me. The only question I'm left asking after hearing this is where can she go from here?
What have been your favourite records of 2008?

St Brendans Sports Review 3/12/2008

2008-12-10T11:37:00.001Z

Welcome to the much loved weekly sports round up of all the college action. Brought to you by popular demand!

Unfortunately there is no action to report on this week as both the football and rugby matches were called off. This week was a victory for English weather.

Good luck to everyone in your upcoming fixtures.

We should Boycott for Geoffrey's return

2008-12-04T14:00:00.001Z

I am sure that I’m not alone in my view that the current Cricket commentators on Sky Sports are simply not good enough. They have a silver lining for every mistake, blunder, error and they are too afraid to say anything bad about the currently under performing England side. Now, there was one man that stood out from the crowd of ’every cloud ..’ commentators and that man was the legendary Geoffrey Boycott OBE.

Boycott is most well known for his ’controversial’ England career as an opening batsman. He would bat for days on end, accumulating large scores but at a snails pace. This caused problems between him and his team mates, especially all-rounder Ian Botham and legendary fast bowler Fred Trueman. British sports journalist Ian Wooldridge OBE once said “Boycott, in short, walks alone". Whilst many disagreed with Boycotts ‘selfish’ batting style, he did play 108 tests for England and scored over 8,000 test runs, so its not like he didn’t do his bit for the team.

They say that ‘those who cant do talk about it’ and that’s exactly what he did. After retiring at the age of 42 with an average of 47 runs per game underneath his belt he moved on to commentary. He was just as influential within cricket whilst in the commentary box, he invented the phrase ‘corridor of uncertainty’ which is the most well known phrase through out cricket to this day. It is also believed that he invented the ‘key test’, this is where you use a car key or a house key, stick it into the cricket pitch and you can tell how hard the wicket is.

His first job in the media was with Talk Sport who offered said that they would stick by him despite his assault conviction which was upheld on appeal. He continued to commentate for the sports based radio station, along with several satellite and Asian channels. His commentary career was sky rocketing, until his life was threatened by throat cancer, it seemed that if he did beat the cancer it would be unlikely that he would ever commentate again. However, having successfully undergone chemotherapy he was back in our ears by late 2003. That is when he hit the big time and struck a deal with channel 4 commentating on the 2005 Ashes victory. That is when we all sat up and took notice of the greatest living Yorkshire man again.

The 2005 Ashes was one of the greatest performances I have ever seen by a team, in any sport, but it wasn’t flawless and you could bet your money on Boycott picking up on those flaws. He would tell it how it was, he didn’t care if it made England look bad, all he cared about was his opinion and getting that opinion across to the public. Obviously many people were not happy with his honest criticism of the England team, especially the players, after witnessing a dropped catch he said ’ I reckon my mum could have caught that in her pinny’. This didn’t make him popular within the England camp, Steve Harmison once said ‘The fact is that within the England dressing room Boycott's views are regarded as a joke…. Indeed, quite a few of us cringe whenever he comes near’. Harmison should just be pleased that Boycott wasn’t commentating on his first ball in England’s defence of the Ashes in 2006 when he managed to bowl it to Andrew Flintoff at first slip!

Geoffrey Boycott’s absence in that Ashes series was extremely noticeable as England lost 5-0 and there wasn’t a commentator there who would say what every England fan was thinking, “England are playing crap!”. I am quite sure that if Boycott had been commentating on that series he would have used a lot harsher language than that, and I don’t think anyone could have argued with him. The reason that Boycott was absent for that, shocking England performance was that Sky Sports had just bought the rights to show all live International Cricket and they didn’t see Geoffrey Boycott as a suitable commentator for there new brand of cricket.

Instead they replaced him with the likes of Michael Holding, a West Indian who has never played for England, Nick Knight, who only ever played 17 tests for England and made his name in county cricket, and Ian Botham who in my opinion shouldn’t be in the commentary box, he should be coaching this below par England team.

So Sky Sports have replaced an outspoken, honest, truthful, England legend with a group of ‘yes’ men who would describe a wide ball as innovative bowling. When will Sky Sports realise that we want honest commentary, we want someone to tell it as it is, we want the greatest living Yorkshire man Geoffrey Boycott.

There's fun to be had yet......

2008-12-03T20:37:00.004Z

My calender for this week:

(Skint? Cheapskate options in bold)
*Recommended*

*******************************

Wednesday, 3 December
Shakoom (First Degree Burns, Gemmy, Superisk) @ The Croft £4***
Groove On @ Dojo (Late of the Pier)
Propaganda@ Syndicate £5

*******************************
Thursday, 4 December

Audio Discharge & I Feel Space @ Timbuk2
Bass to the Face @ Dojo Lounge
Death from Above @ Thekla
Flannel Xmas Party @ NATIVE

*******************************
Friday, 5 December

Blurred Vision @ B-Sides
Brazilian Beatz @ Warehouse ***
DOP present: The Last Investigation @ Timbuk2 (DJ Food & DK)
Free Party @ Native (Breaks,House, Dubstep etc)
Grand Opening @ The Lanes (The Zen Hussies)
Hip Hop Lounge @ The Croft (Sir Beans OBE + Asian Hawk)
Liquid Lounge (Drum & Bass, Dubstep, Breaks) @ Cosies
Shit The Bed @ Lakota (Switch / Zinc / Si begg / Rusko / Danny Byrd)***
Ramshackle @ Carling Academy

*******************************
Saturday, 6 December

Bump Afterhours @ Native***
Ezee Sounds @ Chesters
Hardtek Sessions @ BlackSwan
Socialism @ Thekla £5
Switch & Just Jack @ Timbuk2
Western Soul @ Native

*******************************
Sunday, 7 December

Reggae Sundays @ Cosies
Roasted @ Tube

*******************************
Monday, 8 December

Gorilla Audio @ Thekla

*******************************
Tuesday, 9 December

Club NME Bristol @ The Croft
Run @ Native (Ntype) £5 ***

*******************************
Wednesday, 10 December

Propaganda@ Syndicate £5
Sink (Dubstep) @ Thekla £5***

December Academy Shows

2008-12-03T14:49:00.020Z

Once again the guys at the Academy have given us the chance to gain free entry to one of the many gigs taking place this month. So, if you're willing to give out fliers to the punters for an hour before the show starts, then leave us a comment and we will get back to you. My friend and I fliered for a gig the other week and it was hardly as dull as you'd think.

After an hour or so of handing out fliers in the warm confines of the venue and chatting with the crowd, we got to see Electro band Ladytron as well as the support Asobi Seksu. Although the headliners' set was a little electro-by-numbers, it was well worth seeing Asobi Seksu, one of the not so polished gems to come out of NYC, a city that has housed the likes of MGMT and hundreds of other hype bands this year. And all for nout! Sounds good to me..

December Shows at the Academy

Thurs 4th December- MINT Presents…
THE EXILES / SATURDAYS & SUNDAYS / NOVA ROBOTICS / THE FUEL + DJs

Fri 5th-THE ZUTONS

Sun 7th- ALABAMA 3

Mon 8th- APOCALYPTICA + SWALLOW THE SUN

Thu 11th- BLACK STONE CHERRY

Sun 14th- THE DAMNED

Tue 16th- THE POGUES

Wed 17th- THE WEDDING PRESENT

Thu 18th- FROM THE JAM

St Brendans Sports Review 26/11/2008

2008-12-02T14:00:00.000Z

Welcome back to another eagerly anticipated sports round up of all the action from last week. We start off with the basketball and a grudge match between St Brendans Hussells and Richard Huish College.

If the lads needed anything to help them bounce back from last weeks disappointing result in the South West Tournament, it was this match. A chance to settle the score with Richard Huish College who, earlier in the season, made a mockery of the Hussells by beating them 61 – 27. St Brendans started off well with some good play and quick attack, but once again they couldn’t handle the Richard Huish attack, who were firing on all cylinders. The lads put everything into this match, everyone knew the importance of getting a win and putting there last match with Richard Huish behind them, but they couldn’t do it. Richard Huish were too quick in attack and too strong in defence. St Brendans scored 42 points but they were beaten by a familiar points tally of 61. Man of The Match goes to Chad Barley, who scored 27 of the 42 points.

Next up we have the netball and their friendly against Richard Huish College.

This may have been a friendly match but neither side were taking this match lightly, they all put in maximum effort and the desire to win was inspiring. The girls looked simply brilliant when attacking but it was their defence that let them down, at times it was sloppy and there was a lack of concentration. Richard Huish were, as always, organised and ruthless in their play, and looked unstoppable. The final score was St Brendans 26 – 46 Richard Huish College.

Finally we move on to the St Brendans Rugby team and their friendly against Ashton Park.

The lads went into this match, not really knowing what to expect from this Ashton Park side, but they were not expecting such an easy ride to victory. Ashton Park just didn’t seem up to the challenge of taking on such a strong force as St Brendans. They played with a sense of caution to go forward and if you play like that against St Brendans you haven’t got a chance. The lads bombarded them with waves of attack and Ashton Park were surprisingly resilient at the back but they had nothing to answer with when going forward. The final score was Ashton Park 0 – 36 St Brendans. Man of The Match goes to Mike Uren who played with real grit and determination.

Congratulations to everyone who played this week, good luck in your upcoming fixtures.

Not A Lot To Do!

2008-11-26T15:15:00.005Z

The other day I was taking a mental note of some of the facilities we have available to us around college and I noticed that we have McDonalds, the Refectory, McDonalds and the Refectory. So as you can see we are spoiled for choice! However, I don’t want to put on 12 stone by the time I leave St Brendans, so that rules out McDonalds, and I don’t want to get crushed in a crowd of people, which rules out the Refectory. So as you can see, there really isn’t that much to do in a free.
Of course you could be spending all your time revising, completing homework or just practising some mental arithmetic, but there are some crazy people out there who don’t want to study 24/7. Those fools!
However, the problem with studying is that when you need a computer, you go to the library, log in, open up Word and then a teacher comes along, removes you from the computer and escorts out of the library. So much for studying then. Although you do have another option, the gym. Once again this option comes with a barrier, and that barrier is your induction. Even though nearly all the students here did some elements of weights training in their secondary school, you are still not aloud to use the gym without taking part in an induction. Fair enough, I know safety is paramount but the only problem is no matter how hard I try, no matter how long I beg, I can’t seem to get an induction for when I’m not in lesson. So long toned physic, I’m off to McDonalds!

What is there that can be done?

Well, I have spoke to people who are currently in a sixth form or a college and they can’t believe how little we have in terms of free activities. They have a common room, table football, a snooker table, a weights room that is actually available to students, the whole 9 yards. I don’t want you thinking that this is coming from students in posh schools, who wear blazers and have to call their teachers ’Master’. This is coming from students at Hengrove sixth form and Broadlands sixth form, not schools with the highest budgets or reputations.
If these schools can fork out a couple of hundred for a decent common room and some free leisure activities, why can’t we! We are not asking for anything special, just something to keep us from spending £5 on 1000 calories. It’s not much.

For those of you who were expecting some info on a secret hangout just outside of college. I am sorry, I am sorry to report that our options only stretch as far as a ‘thrilling’ retail park, Lidls and Miss Millies (If you can be bothered to walk that far).I am truly sorry for our loss

St Brendans Sports Review 19/11/2008

2008-11-25T14:00:00.002Z

Welcome back to another round up of the weeks sports matches. We start with the college football team and their away fixture against a strong Yeovil College team.

The lads went into this match not knowing what to expect from this Yeovil College side, St Brendans had been playing well recently but Yeovil have a reputation as a strong attacking side, and they upheld their reputation in this 3-1 victory. The lads played with determination to not let Yeovil score, but it was not enough for Yeovil College’s quick passing and intelligent movement off the ball, at times it was like watching Man United. St Brendans managed to pull a goal back through Jay Bellow, but it proved only to be a consolation in the end. The lads worked hard and were unlucky not to get more from the game. Man of The Match goes to Chris Gardner.

Next up we have the rugby and the lads encounter with a Richard Huish side that has caused the college teams some problems in the past.

St Brendans started this match well aware of the performances Richard Huish College has put in against St Brendans in recent encounters (especially Basketball) , and that just added extra incentive to go out and win the match. It was a tough match for the Richard Huish defence, having to face waves of attack from St Brendans, and they couldn’t cope. The lads scored 14 points to Richard Huish College’s 5 and it was a truly brilliant display of disciplined attack. All the lads put in 110% but Man of The Match goes to Sam Hallwell.

Finally we have the St Brendans Hussells performance in the South West Tournament. The lads played well in a tough tournament and were unlucky to only finish 5th out of 10. Some great performances from the lads but they came up against some extremely tough competition.

Congratulations to everyone who played this week, good luck in your upcoming fixtures.

Everything is Average Nowadays

2008-11-21T16:30:00.004Z

Is it just me or is Chart music getting progressively worse lately?
I listen to Radio 1 in the mornings for the lovely Chris Moyles (love him or hate him he must be doing something good, with millions of listeners, something XFM would probably kill for) and today I swear with each song, excluding Oasis' Lyla (one of their weaker songs in my opinion) the quality got more and more dire. I mean, have you heard that TI song that's currently the second biggest download on iTunes?

It's utter bilge, and yet more people have downloaded this song this week than Kings of Leon or Guns 'n' Roses. How is this possible?

Now I'm not a huge fan of either of those bands, very much overrated really, but surely their music is much more original and musically interesting than a song whose best bit is the riff they borrowed from O Zone? Elsewhere, you've got songs like Womanizer by Britney Spears, albeit not as terrible as some of her songs released in her bald headed psycho phase, but still, where's the substance?

Each to their own and all, and I know the same could be said for some of the gazillion white guitar bands out there, but there's nothing new here. Nothing to excite me, nothing to make me stop what I'm doing and actually listen to it. Not on the radio anyway, unless you go to stations like NME Radio (and Kerrang radio to a certain extent, though ever since they played Scouting for Girls I have abstained from listening to it, rock my arse) or 6 Music, which offer some alternative. Still, what's evidently clear is that the above is the type of music that appeals to the mainstream, teenage i.e. downloader's market who will actually purchase the songs; altogether a very depressing thing.

Am I wrong? What do you think about the state of the Top 40?

Some decent Radio stations:
Radio Flex- For a truly diverse mix of music designed to wake you up in the morning.
NME Radio
XFM
Triple J
6Music
Think of any more? Let me know, I'll add them here.

Skinny Jeans: Are you man enough?

2008-11-20T14:00:00.002Z

Man Style!

By reading this article I am assuming that you are considering purchasing your own pair of skinny jeans, and I say congratulations to you on bettering your life.

For those of you who have a slim figure and don’t know what to style goes well with your shape, skinny jeans are an untapped source. However, before you go down to Cabot Circus and make your purchase there are one or two things I need to let you know about with wearing skinnies.

Despite what I have said I don’t want you to go thinking that these styles of jeans are faultless. They are not. First of all you will have to deal with that little voice in your head telling you that you look like a woman. That is an unavoidable barrier that you have to overcome. No matter how masculine you are. However, this voice’s name is ‘self-confidence’ and if you care about what other people think of what you wear then I would suggest that you stop reading at this point…….

For those of you who have not closed down your computer and gone out to buy a pair of Addidas tracksuit bottoms, let me tell you the next problem you men will face, the comfort. Don’t get me wrong, skinnies are the most comfortable pair of trousers I have ever worn and that is due to the fact that that you don’t even notice you are wearing them. However, that skin tight feeling comes at a price, quite a high price aswell, we all know that when you get an itch in your, ‘Happy Zone’, shall we say, that it is a battle between man and denim to itch the area discreetly, it is an art that nearly all men have mastered. I’m sorry to say that if you wear skinny jeans, denim has won that battle. Due to the nature of the jeans, you would have to have the thinnest hands in the world to even reach down there, let alone without anyone calling the police because of indecent exposure. So if you are the type of man who plays with his ‘Happy Zone’ all day long, then this is where your journey ends ……

So far I have eliminated the self conscious and the down right disturbing, and now for those of you who are self confident and don’t feel the need to touch yourself every two seconds, I am going to let you into some of the perks of wearing skinny jeans.
Firstly, exclusiveness. As you can see I have eliminated over half my audience in the first segment of my article and you who are left are the chosen ones. You are the ones who don’t mind a few itches for the sake of looking good, you are the ones who would use a tie as a belt just so that you look different, you are the ones who should and can wear skinny jeans.

Another great reason to choose skinny jeans above any other style in the denim family tree is the wide variety of clothes that can accompany this style, for example, shoes. There are a large choice in shoes that can be worn with skinnies, daps, converse’, Vans, DCs, Etnies, the list goes on and on.

So if you are still reading at this point, here is some advice for you, buy skinny jeans. You won’t regret it!

Return of AC/DC: Modern great or money maker?

2008-11-20T14:00:00.001Z

AC/DC are back with avengence!

Black Ice is the returning album of rock 'n' roll titans AC/DC, showing that class is truly permanent. Like a fine wine, they have gotten better with age, and yes, their fashion sense may be a tad out of date and have a grey hair here and there but they sound like they've never been away.

Their new feature album is 15 tracks of pure gold. I'm a rock/rock 'n' roll lover and have bought many albums such as Appetite for Destruction, Death Magnetic and I would like to buy Chinese Democracy and now I can because I've been saving up the money for the past 7 years and finally have enough. Anyway, I would strongly recommend buying this album since it contains all the things a brilliant rock album should: powerful and distinctive vocals, kick ass guitar solos/riffs and lyrics that don't contain random swearing. Fun for the whole family!

Thankfully, this isn't a hollow attempt from the band to try and earn more money, they have actually collaborated together again and have put pure passion into playing. If you don't believe me, listen to Brian Johnson's vocals and tell me he's not giving it his all. Angus Young has some sweet solos without overdoing it too much, putting emotion into every chord.

There's not much more I can say about this modern classic. Except buy it.

Rock 'n' Roll with Black Ice

Kerching!: The Sound of The Smiths?

2008-11-19T14:42:00.003Z

So I got the latest of a series of Smiths' compilation albums, this one entitled 'The Sound of The Smiths' today; as an avid fan of the seminal band I thought I'd better. When I first heard about the new record I, like countless others (probably) held a faint glimmer of hope that the Gods of Gloom would reform. Now to be honest, I think the day they do reform will be the day those crazy CERN guys wipe out the planet with a black hole. Still, as much as I love The Smiths, hearing this album I can't help but hear the distant ding of cash registers.

The double album boasts 45 Smiths' songs, including classic such as Heaven Knows I'm Miserable Now and William it Was Really Nothing, as well as live tracks and 'rare' B sides, and all this for £15 (!). I actually really like this album, the tracks have been slightly remastered and not sound so clangy as on other versions, and the album art of their previous album art looks quite good, (you can tell who was in charge of picking the pictures can't you?) but I have this nagging feeling in the back of my head that this is all rather unnecessary. I like that it's out as it gives those unlucky (or lucky if you count the Thatcher years) enough not to have been around whilst they were still together, but it's really just a very unsubtle attempt at making a few bob.

Although this album was remastered by Johnny Marr, and Moz had the arduous task of thinking of a name for it, a part of me wonders if really this album was executed by Warners in an attempt to shift a few more units in an era where album sales have declined. I don't mean to get all conspiracy theorist on you, but it would make sense:

When the band did join Warner Bros. it was at the very end of their career, so they can't have made that much revenue from them. Some also signalled the point that they joined a 'mainstream' label as the beginning of the end for them. The band were already struggling with management issues amongst alleged internal squabbles, and there had already been two compilation albums since the extraordinary Queen is Dead, it seemed that they were running out of steam.
After numerous failed attempts at getting the band to reform, a reunion didn't ever appear on the cards. Morrissey even went as far as saying he'd "rather eat my (his) own testicles than reform The Smiths," and, for a vegetarian that's serious.
So, it would seem apt that now, in an age where the likes of Take That and The Verve have reformed that the label would want to release another compilation in order to boost sales and potentially propel the rumour mill into thinking that they too are jumping on the bandwagon and have kissed and made up.

I'm sorry for being so cynical, I must say I do adore this band, and you just have to take a look at a lot of the modern indie bands out there to know that they've been a huge influence on the music scene. I promise that if The Smiths ever reform though, I will publish a post declaring that I will prance about in the centre of Bristol wearing a jam jar costume complete with Gladioli, and I will do so gladly.

The Sound of The Smiths is out now, on Physical copy, 12" and download.

What do you think:

Is this album purely for the dosh?

Or is there something more to it?

Do tell.

An Alternative night out?

2008-11-19T12:00:00.001Z

attend the theatre, yes, on the one condition that you wear this.

A typical night out may often entail a stint of heavy drinking with a group of friends, which may result in a rather embarrassing incident of having your head in a bucket, and looking like Regan out of the exorcist the next morning.

However, your beauty sleep can be restored with a therapeutic evening out at the Bath Theatre Royal. Really? I ask you say. Well I aimed to test this theory, and happened to enjoy a relaxing evening of contemporary dance and men in spandex, the combination was ‘Splendid’ as my ecstatic Grandmother remarked sitting next to me. Although not deliberately humorous, I personally found the pirouetting displays of men in Y-fronts a sight to giggle at, as did Gran.

You may be thinking that I am sad spending my Friday night watching dance with my Granny, however I feel that at our age we are forced into a stereotype of only enjoying binge drinking, and cat fights in the town centre. I say add a bit of culture to your sacred Friday night, and it may surprise you.

Theatres and dance halls were once upon a time the place to be seen on a Friday night out. So why did that change? Why can’t we incorporate watching theatre and dance in our social lives? It seems that it has become associated with a dull family outing which you are dragged along to, and not something we would do for fun. However there is more out there then a cheesy thigh slapping Panto, (though a big fan!), I appreciate that it isn’t for everyone’s taste, there is an extensive range of theatre available in Bath and Bristol, from musicals at the Hippodrome to one women shows at the Tobacco Factory, and most of them are only the cost of a couple of pints.

Of course I am not suggesting you abandon a good old knees up on the weekend, quite the contrary, (I mean the theatres have a bar!)

However, why not occasionally consider a change to your routine Friday night at the pub, ‘and go to the theatre darling!’ For a hang over free night out.

Appearing at ‘The Tobacco Factory’ soon..

Oh what a lovely war!

13TH – 22ND Nov

A cast of colourful characters swap hats, helmets and sides to give a vibrant and touching account of the four years between 1914 and 1918 during the War that shaped the twentieth century.

Goodbye Mrs Chips

25TH-29TH NOV

After nearly 60 years of sterling service at Brookshields School, dinner lady extraordinaire, Mrs. Chipping is finally hanging up her potato masher, egg mallet and gravy sieve for the last time. She has watched generation…

Shades of Brown

30th NOV

Comic, bold and deeply moving, this thought provoking one-woman show asks: can one person’s healthy glow be another’s social stigma? Around the globe money and time is poured into tanning or bleaching. From a South…

St Brendans Sports Review 13/11/2008

2008-11-18T20:00:00.000Z

Welcome to this weeks college sports round up. First up we have the rugby and the lad’s away game to Wycliffe.

This match was always going to be a tough encounter between the two sides and St Brendans knew they had to be on top of their game if they wanted to come away with a win. Wycliffe dominated the first half, scoring for fun and unbeatable at the back. It seemed that it was going to be a long game for St Brendans. The lads got together at half time, down 20 – 3, and realised that they had to put in that little bit extra if they wanted to win this game. The second half was played with great determination by the lads and they were throwing everything they had at the Wycliffe defence, but they remained resilient. St Brendans managed to salvage 7 points in the second half to Wycliffe’s 3 points, but it was not enough. The lads showed great heart and passion to win but it simply wasn’t enough on the day with Wycliffe winning 23-10. St Brendans went down fighting and were unlucky not to get more from the game. Man of The Match goes to Alex Fox who was the pick of the bunch.

Next up we have cover from the St Brendans Hussell’s match against Gloscats in round 1 of the British Colleges League Cup.

St Brendans went into this match full of confidence and expectation of proceeding to the next round. They played with great skill; quick passing and the result never seemed in doubt. It was a strong performance from the lads winning 52 – 37. The waves of attack were too much for Gloscats to handle and they buckled under the pressure. They managed to cause some trouble for the Hussell’s defence but it was not enough to force an upset. A great performance by the lads, proceeding into the next round. Man of The Match goes to Doe Worjeah.

This is the part where I would move onto how the St Brendans football got on but unfortunately, due to the pitch being water logged, the game was abandoned.

Congratulations to everyone who played this week, good luck in your upcoming fixtures.

FIFA 09 vs PES 09 - The Fightback

2008-11-15T14:51:00.000Z

You may have heard in a related article by one of my "peers" that Pro Evolution Soccer 2009 has brutally knocked FIFA 09 out cold, crashing to the canvas with the ten count imminently approaching. Believe not these words of lies! You have only heard one side of the story (from what I understand is very biased source).

Admittedly, yes, over the past few years EA has become sloppy, putting mediocre features onto out of date consoles that did not have the ability to make FIFA a good game to play. At the same time, PES was a steadily growing force in the background, gathering many good reviews from fans and journalists alike. I myself was a firm PES follower until this year when I personally sampled the two games. I was disappointed with this edition of PES. It seems all they have done have stuck a new face on the front, in the form of Lionel Messi. Style over substance, it seems.

FIFA's loss was PES' gain. People were rapidly liking this idea of competition that was actually better than FIFA, unlike such things as THIS IS FOOTBALL which for some reason can't say its name without shouting. As PES grew in power, FIFA was dying out, trying each year to make itself better but had no fresh ideas to keep people interested. PES 6 was born and it seemed that the final nail had firmly been placed in the FIFA coffin.

However, since then, PES has been growing stale and FIFA has had a breath of new life in to it since the conversion to next gen consoles. After PES 2008, I began to worry. The game had become far too easy and scoring was just too simple. As long as you had the ball in their half, just shoot. Job done. At least FIFA attempted to make something that resembled real life football instead of a game that if you had Ronaldinho in your team you automatically won 6-0.

Now we come to PES 2009. Oh dear. What has happened? Our beloved PES has become the FIFA of old. They protest against these claims with their "new" Be a Pro mode. New. I'm sorry Konami but FIFA had that last year. And why can't they spell Uefa Champions League without an unnessecary font of anger? E.g. UEFA CHAMPIONS LEAGUE. Also, the Master League. A poor man's version of the Manager Mode of FIFA, a knocked off game mode that fell off the back of EA's lorry and Konami snapped up and named it differently hoping no one would notice. I did. I'm pretty sure everyone else did too.

Now don't get me wrong, PES 2009 isn't terrible. It has some perks that I will admit Konami has thrown in to keep people true to the PES brand but I'm afraid it just isn't enough for me, who will this year buy the FIFA edition of football game for the first time in quite a while. I have turned my back on PES but with good reason. They have declined in standard and gone downhill dramatically.

If you only return one game this year, return PES 2009 for FIFA 09 instead. Trust me.

Film: Pirate, Private or Paid For?

2008-11-13T16:04:00.003Z

So, with the arrival of the Cinema de Lux at the new Cabot Circus, a trip to check out the cinema where the audience is promised a magical experience with ‘extra wide Ultra Leather loveseats’ (are they saying we’re fat?) has definitely been on most Bristol film buff’s to-do lists. The question is, can the plush new multiplex triumph over a night in on your own sofa with a copy of Adulthood that you got for three-fifty at Southmead market?

There are questionable cons of pirate DVDs and TV Links type things. They're not really for the visually impaired; sometimes the fuzzy or stretched picture can begin to annoy you, especially if you're busy trying to see if Keira Knightly has better skin than you. There's also the possibility of the odd silhouette of a front row resident sprinting across the length of the room as they decide they need the toilet at the most crucial moment of the film. Apart from that, it’s cost efficient, energy efficient (if the last thing you want to do on a Friday night is walk to Broadmead) and at least we’re only 4 metres from the nearest loo...

However, on the off chance that you decide against piracy, DO visit Cinema de Lux. It probably IS worth it. The shiny new film haven introduces its swanky Studio One restaurant, the Directors Hall and Lounge and a number of staff there to spoon-feed you.
Besides these amenities, I’m fairly sure that the greatest relief to every film-goer visiting the Cinema de Lux is that we can finally wear something nice, and know it’s not going to come home smelling like stale popcorn and body odour. I hasten to add that it’s also reassuring that you won’t fall victim to a pick ‘n’ mix assault from the gang of school-kids sat on the back row.

Enticing? Tickets are around £6 for the standard seating screens (not extortion but at this price alone you might want to byo sandwich on the sly). If you're feeling flush though, opt for the Directors Hall. You'll be paying a steep £9, buuuut you don't have to leave your seat for anything, a ‘concierge’ (a boy in a hat) is at your beck and call to bring you food from the ‘Studio One’ menu (note: they will not accompany you to the toilet, so don't ask). The downfalls of the Director's Hall is that you WILL be sitting next to either a) a geek b) a business man, c) a businesswoman or d) a couple who think you can’t see/hear them groping.
Things are looking up though, you no longer have to sneak alcohol in with you; cocktails and other drinks are available from the cinema's Studio One bar. I wonder how many times the bartenders were asked for a martini; shaken, not stirred….

(I have yet to visit the Cinema de Lux. I think I'll stick to the watershed for now though....)

Don’t spill your beer on me: A guide to Indie gig etiquette

2008-11-12T15:41:00.000Z

At St. Brendan’s I like to think that musical taste is varied and people respect that. When I walk into college you can kind of make assumptions about what music people listen to according to fashion sense, of course I shouldn’t do this, but it’s unavoidable and I’m sure everyone’s guilty of it.

I don’t like that some peoples musical taste seem to take over their lives in that, they have listened to one punk band and now they are like right, I’m punk, forever. Nothing else.

Similarly this can be said for the Goths, metalheads, emo, scene kids and indie scenesters. But why is it like this? With people mixing outside there music taste why doesn’t an indie kid take a Goth to see The Long Blondes? Can an emo be taken to see Metallica by his long haired friend? To try and spur people to discover new musical genres I have written a guide to an indie gig for the inexperienced.

1. Dress for the occasion.

you're trying too hard

Yes you may just be going to a concert but trust me unless you can pull off effortlessly cool and underdressed chic it would be good to put in a bit of effort. You will understand why when you see the Hoxton/Shoreditch wannabes and you realise that you haven’t washed these jeans in four days and you can see a soup stain. There’s nothing worse then getting the evils of the Thekla/Lousiana fashionistas. Don’t worry about anything like at Bristol Academy, nobody cares and you will get beer on you at some point. Although one thing to remember is don’t go over the top, you don’t want to end up looking like Peaches Geldof.

2. Decide where you are going to be and stick by it.

If you are at the back, stay at the back, if you try and make a break to the front you have to have some level of skill at pushing. If you are near the front middleish then decide who is going to
handle getting the alcohol and nessecery provisions.

This is so when you have to get back from the bar you can use the classic line ‘My friends at the front’. Looking as embarrassed and peevish works well too. Always finish your drink before the main band come on, because it will get knocked all over your face and it never looks classy licking it off.

3. Avoid the Mosh Pit.

Sometimes at Indie gigs at the Thekla people get this crazy idea that the band is really heavy metal dude and they have to start a half arsed mosh pit. The half arsed mosh pit is a dangerous thing, if it was a real one everyone who didn’t want to be in it would form a neat circle around. A half hearted mosh pit is like a black hole, from nowhere one will erupt and you will dragged into it by a middle aged balding man (it’s always him).

Although it sounds like I’m making it sound like a bad thing it can be very fun when it’s the right band and atmosphere, for example I was in a very enjoyable mosh pit for Be Your Own Pet (R.I.P). However if you are following this guide and have brought a Goth, emo, scene kid or metalhead then do not let them near the pit. They will either sneer at the pit all night or want to jump in and show all the stupid indie kids how it’s done, and most people will do the latter. Then get chucked out.

4. Don’t stand near Jeff.

For the LOVE of God don’t stand near Jeff.

look the other way, it's jeff

The truth about knife crime and the youth of today

2008-11-12T15:01:00.000Z

It’s a Friday night. It’s 7 pm and I’ve only been up for three hours after last nights ‘interesting’ party. Its time to get ready for yet another night on the streets, I go to grab a shirt but I trip over that bottle of cheap vodka from last week and it spills all over that girl’s jacket she left here. I put on my gang colours, flip my hood over my head and slip my knife into my back pocket. Just another average night for the youth of today. Is this your typical night out?

I am an average 16 year old, I go to college, I have a part-time job and yes, I own a hoody, but never before have I been tempted to take a knife out with me and butcher any elderly person that passes by. However, if you believe what you read and hear in the media, then everything I just told you is a huge lie. We, apparently, carry a knife in every pocket, have Cider running through our veins 24/7 and we all belong to the Bloods or Latin Kings or what ever gang the tabloids can think of. We are the cause for the lack of culture within Great Britain, the high crime rate and I’m pretty sure that it won’t be long until we get the blame for the credit crunch as well.

I am not saying that the media are making all of this up just so the country can have a target to pin all there problems to. I wouldn’t dare say that. As we all know that there is no smoke without fire and a small percentage of today’s teenagers do carry knives and some do binge drink. There are teenagers out there who might be apart of some pathetic gang within the ghetto’s of Whitchurch but a majority of the youth today are embarrassed to be grouped with these ‘yobs’.

As a teenager in the midst of this media conspiracy against the youth of today, I feel that the stereotype placed upon young people is unjust and false. We are not how the media portray us. We are not destroying our society. We are not the enemy.

Free entry at Carling Academy

2008-11-12T15:00:00.000Z

Like Music?

Want free entry to upcoming gigs at the Carling Academy?

If so, then you're in luck.

In exchange for handing out fliers at the Academy for an hour and a half, you can gain free entry to the gig you're fliering.

People will be needed for the following shows:

Weds 12th November- MERCURY REV+Howling Bells &Aviv Geffen

Thursday 13th November- HORACE ANDY+ Trojan Soundsystem

Friday 14th November- GZA aka GENIUS+ DJ MIK

Wednesday 19th November- LADYTRON+ Asobi Seksu

Friday 21st November- OPETH + Cynic + The Ocean

Saturday 22nd November- THE COMPLETE STONE ROSES (8PM)

For gigs taking place on a Friday you would need to be at the venue for 6.30pm, whilst at all other nights you would need to be there 5 minutes before doors.

Interested?
Please drop us an e-mail to let us know and we will get in touch.
brendansblog@hotmail.co.uk

pic flickr